Never Let You Fall
by Lillibetm3
Summary: Rose and the 9th Doctor visit the paradise planet of Harku, and come to terms with their feelings for eachother.Rated for chapter 12
1. Dance Teacher to Elvis

CHAPTER 1 : DANCE TEACHER TO ELVIS

Rose looked at the Doctor in complete disbelief, as an irrepressible grin took over her face. " You're such a liar.!"

He looked hurt, and a little offended. "It's true.!"

Rose reeled in her wide smile and tried to take him seriously. The Doctors ego was a delicate thing, and she didn't want him sulking.  
"You knew Elvis.?" She lifted a sceptical eyebrow

"Yeah." He replied, full of conviction.

"Ok. So what was he like then.?" She asked, still not sure she believed him.

" He was fantastic." The Doctor said. "But he couldn't dance - useless... two left feet."

Rose's mouth fell open in astonishment. "That's mad."

"What he needed was a gimmick you see. He already had the talent and the looks. Bit like me in fact."

Rose rolled her eyes.

"But." The Doctor continued. "He needed something more. That's where I came in."

"You.?" Her doubts on the credibility of this story were sky rocketing.

"Who do you think taught him his hip swivel.?" The Doctor asked. His sudden grin lighting up the room with his brilliance. Then as if to prove his point, he demonstrated a full ' Elvis The Pelvis' gyration for her viewing pleasure.

Rose shrieked with surprise, but quickly put a hand over her mouth to contain any further giggles.

"Has that effect on most women." The Doctor said with a definate hint of pride. Then, turning his back on Rose he headed over to the TARDIS console and began messing about with the controls again.

Rose followed in a second or two, after she had regained her composure. "So... dance teacher to Elvis huh.? You'll be telling me next that you can... ice skate." She teased.

The Doctor glanced up. "Not at a professional level."

Rose looked surprised. "Seriously, you can ice skate.?"

"Well." The Doctor began, with as much modesty as he could muster. "I'm not the type to blow my own trumpet, but you hang around the universe for 900 years, you pick up a hobby or two."

"Such as.?"

He shrugged. "Fishing, cooking, painting, rock climbing, bell ringing... knitting."

"Oh my God. You'll be telling me next you collect stamps."

"No !" The Doctor exclaimed. "Now that." He said firmly. "Is for saddos."

Rose giggled, her smile widening. "Shame really."

"Why's that.?"

"Mickey used to collect stamps."

The Doctor grinned from ear to ear. "My point entirely.!"

Rose's laughter softened as she leant in close, the Doctors arms coming to hold her gently as he drew her slowly to him. She tilted her head back to gaze up into his eyes as he in turn looked into her very soul. Rose held on to every last moment, afraid it would end too soon - as it always did. It seemed that whenever she got too close he would pull away. Although lately he was holding her in his arms, more and more. And when he did, she would feel heart beats, hear them, all three. She almost imagined she could feel the movement of time... maybe she could when he held her close like this. It was spellbinding.

She wondered if he knew that she loved him. She wondered if there would ever be a time when he... no. She was being stupid. He didn't think of her like that. He never would. She was just going to have to face up to the fact that they were too different. It was like her Mum said, 'what could a Time Lord have in common with a shopgirl'.?

Finding strength from somewhere deep inside herself, Rose slowly moved out of the Doctors arms, stepping back.

"Um... I think I'll just..." She looked into his face. "I... I... need to freshen up before we land." Then she turned on her heel and vanished through a rear door that led off toward a maze of corridors.

The light dimmed in the Doctors eyes as he watched her leave. He figured he'd held on to her too long. Again. It was just that letting her go was getting more difficult every time. He knew he'd have to be more careful, or he was going to scare her. She might start thinking he was some kind of old letch... which technically.

Pushing his hands deep into the pockets of his leather jacket, he groaned inwardly. He tried not to dwell on the whole age gap thing, it depressed him too much. So, he did the only thing he could - he kicked the TARDIS console. HARD.

They emerged from the TARDIS, walking out into a bright and pleasingly warm new world. A lush green expanse of soft grass and wild flowers covered the ground, and the air was filled with a sweet honey like scent. The vast trees that were growing everywhere were covered with heavy rope ladders, and high above the ground, as Rose looked up, blinking in the fierce sunlight, she could see what looked like rope walkways or bridges running from tree to tree, many of which were thick with creeping vines, heavy with exotic looking flowers. But through all of this, what she noticed most of all was the Doctor. There was something odd about the way he was...

"Why are you limping.?"

The Doctor winced as he took another couple of steps. "Long story." He dismissed.

Rose frowned. "So give me the short version."

"Stubbed my toe."

He was ahead of her now, standing at the base of a tree, one hand on the first rung of a rope ladder that trailed down. He looked back at her and gave that mad grin of his. Roses heart skipped a beat.

"Come on then." He encouraged. "Last one to the top is a stamp collector.!"

Laughing, Rose ran toward him.

Rose didn't know how long they had been climbing, but it seemed like forever. "Are we there yet.?" She asked hopefully, even though she hated herself for doing it.

The Doctor looked over his shoulder to her and smiled, winning a bet he'd made with her half way up. "Nearly. It's worth the climb, honest."

"It Better be." Rose grumbled under her breath.

"It will be.!" The Doctor enthused.

Rose sighed, she had forgotten about his ears. "Ok. So, where are we again.?"

"We're up a tree Rose."

"Doctor.!"

"Sorry." He gave her another wild silly smile and she forgave him. "Couldn't resist it."

"Well?"

"The planet Harku. Rich, fertile, warm, and vibrant. Think paradise Rose. It's people worship the land, the seasons, the elements, the Great Goddess Harku."

"Great Goddess.?" Rose asked.

"Mother Earth." The Doctor translated. "They're like...tree huggers to the power of 10." He smiled.

"Sort of New Age then."

"New to you humans... but to the Harkuns their way of life is as old as the begining of time. The Great Goddess breathed new and wonderous life into a dead world. She blessed it's people, bringing them to life again. In return they swore an oath to protect this world forever."

"Nice story." Rose said distantly.

Another four or five steps upward and she bumped into the Doctor, who had apperantly stopped climbing. "Why are you...?"

She looked just beyond him, and saw that they were almost at a wooden platform that was connected to one of the rope bridges she had seen from the ground. At last she was going to be able to stand up, or better still sit down.

"Thank the Goddess that's over.!"

The Doctor took Rose's hand, pulling her up and onto the platform. As he steadied her, Rose stepped quickly onto the walkway so that she was standing beside him. He still held her hand.

"You ok.?"

She nodded. She couldn't speak. He'd been right, the view was... incredible. They were standing in a jungle of branches that stretched out for miles. Everwhere she looked were similar rope walkways running from tree to tree. Further away she could see mountains and valleys, and as she looked up she saw a giant rock face framing the right side of the trees, and down this jagged rock crashed the most amazing waterfall. She was lost in all of this for a moment, then she looked to the Doctor again. He was looking into her eyes, not at the view. She told herself it was because he has seen it before, he'd known how amazing it was... but still she couldn't help the faint blush that crept into her cheeks under his constant gaze.

"You just love it when you're right, don't you.?"

She slipped her hand out from his and moved to the side of the bridge, looking over the edge. The Doctor joined her and peered over too. They were both silent as they contemplated the ground far below. Rose was the first to speak.

"So, how high up do you think we are.?"

"Let's just say that if you fell..."

"Yes.?" Rose said.

"It wouldn't end well."

She laughed, she couldn't help it. No-matter how hard she tried to stop her feelings from getting out - they found a way.

The Doctor reached across and took her hand, holding it protectively in his. "But I would never let you fall, Rose Tyler."

She pulled her hand free, and tightly gripped the rope she was leaning over. "I know." She said, trying to make her voice sound normal, while inside her heart was breaking for the love of him. "So, what are these... Harkuns like then.?"

Deep within himself, the Doctor screamed for his weakness. So much for not scaring her he thought. He knew he had to bluff it out somehow, and so he tried to steady his voice.

"They're an extremely hospitable race. Warm and friendly. Generous to a fault, and completely welcoming."

Rose moved away from the Doctors side. "I think you need a new guide book."

The Doctor turned around. Rose wasn't making any sense. But then he saw what she was staring at and he understood. Somehow they were now surrounded by a group of perhaps twenty Harkuns, each one standing with spears pointed directly at them.

"Oh and another thing." The Doctor glanced over to Rose, his manner unchanged, almost as if he hadn't noticed their current situation. "Phyically they're alot like Humans, except for their..."

"Tails." Rose finished for him.

He grinned broadly. "Well observed.!" 


	2. The Tree Temples

THE TREE TEMPLES

She knew that it was rude to stare - but Rose couldn't help it. Tails were something new. Especilly when in every other respect the Harkuns looked more or less Human. Well maybe not in every way, their eyes she noticed, instead of being brown or blue or green, were yellow, pink and orange. She quite liked the orange.

They were an attractive race, slim and athletic looking with thick unruly dark brown hair. They were dressed (just about) in what looked like a combination of woven cloth and leather and wore soft hand-sewn leather shoes. Another thing she noticed that was different was that their bodies were painted, daubed with streaks of muted natural colours. Infact she was so taken with how attractive they all looked, she almost forgot about the spears. Almost.

The Doctor clenched his right hand into a fist, and as Rose watched in bewilderment he first struck his chest on the left then the right, at the exact position of each of his two hearts. As he did so he spoke the words - 'Sound and True', in a clear strong vioce, then he dropped his hand to his side and waited.

Dumbfounded, Rose stared at him, then cautiously looked to the Harkuns. For some reason that Rose didn't understand they seemed even more taken aback than she was. But as she watched, a strange thing happened. Gradually, one by one, spears began to be lowered, and albeit reluctantly - each of the group returned the salute of 'Sound and True' to the Doctor. That is all but one.

From what Rose could make out he was in charge of the group who stood before them, as the others had all looked to him, almost for guidance, before they had chosen to acknowledge the Doctor. Rose thought him to be roughly her own age, which would make him perhaps a little older than the rest, taller too. His eyes were a striking yellow which flashed with an occasional glint of gold, and made Rose wonder if perhaps she rather prefered yellow to orange.

He came forward, looking into the Doctors face, as if to un-nerve him. Seconds passed by far too slowly, until at last he spoke.

"That is an ancient greeting." He said with reverance. "How is it that you speak it.?"

The Doctor did not flinch, indeed he seemed to grow even more sure of himself, and when he answered, it was not to this one man, but to all who stood with their breath bated.

"I speak it because It was created in my honour. An oath, to be passed down through generations and become part of your history." He paused and returned his stone cold gaze to this one man who stood before him, still half challenging his presence there. "I am the Doctor."

At these words, heads bowed respectfully and the Harkuns weapons were instantly dropped at their feet. All thought of menace was gone, replaced by almost an air of admiration.

As Rose watched the face of the Harkun who stood with the Doctor she saw that he had been surprised by his answer. For as much as he tried to hide it away in the depths of his yellow eyes, Rose could see he was struggeling to accept what he had heard. But others had heard the Doctors words too, and they seemed far more willing, perhaps even eager, to believe.

"Owler.?" A sudden voice disturbed the strained silence, as the group parted to allow an old man who walked with a heavy wooden staff, to come forward. It seemed to Rose that the arrival of this weathered old man amongst them, had removed all of the of younger mans authority, as he became at once like the others, with respectful head bowed.

The old mans vibrant pink eyes glanced quickly from the Doctor to Rose, before coming to rest upon the young man at his side.

"What is the meaning of this, Owler.?" His voice was calm but filled with the strength of a leader. "Am I to understand that weapons have been drawn in the Tree Temples.?"

The younger man, Owler, appeared tortured by his own thoughts, as he struggled to give his reply. "My Sage... we came only to protect the Temples from the strangers. We have spilt no blood."

"You have spilt no blood." The old man shook his head with regret. "These words do not redeem your folly Owler. The Tree Temples are sacred and pure, yet you and your...companions, have seen fit to attempt to taint all with poison."

"My Sage..." Owler pleaded, apparently traumatised by the old mans words. "We meant only to keep the Temples safe...when we learnt of the strangers arrival we gathered arms only to..."

"I have heard enough."

"So have I." Said the Doctor. As to Roses alarm, he strode forward toward the old man, until he was staring him square in the face. "Is this any way to greet an old friend, Ibroc.?"

For what seemed an eternity, both men stood stone faced and almost nose to nose. Rose half thought it was as if they were challenging the other to blink first. But then almost at the very same moment they each broke into wide warm smiles, and in the next they were laughing and slapping eachother on the back. Rose leant against the rope bridge in growing bewilderment. The Doctor never failed to surprise her.

Ibrocs attention flickered to Rose. "You are travelling with the Doctor.?" He asked.

Rose moved forward. "Um, yeah." Cautiously she offered her hand in greeting, (hoping that it wasn't an insult to do so, as it had been on Turnak 4.) "Rose Tyler, pleased to meet you."

Ibroc glanced to the Doctor, a look of approval in his pink eyes, before taking Roses hand in his and raising it to his lips, brushing a mere hint of a kiss to her fingers.

"Welcome to Harku, Rose Tyler. I offer you my most humble apologies for the way you have been treated thus far. Please know that you and the Doctor are our honoured guests."

With this, Ibroc turned to gaze out across the expanse of trees, and as Rose looked, she saw that on every bridge that she could see, stood more and more Harkuns, their attention firmly fixed on the old man. Ibroc held up the wooden staff he walked with and called out to all those who could hear his words.

"My sons. My daughters. Fill your hearts with gladness and joy. The Great Goddess has seen fit to steer the path of our friend the Doctor to our world once again. This is a day of celebration for all, and tonight we will hold a feast to welcome and honour our worthy guests."

A great chorus of cheers errupted at Ibrocs announcement, and it reverberated throughout the forest, until its riot of noise disturbed the bird like creatures that were roosting in the highest branches, setting them into flight, so that when Rose looked up, she was lost for a moment in the rainbow of colours that swept and soared through the turquoise sky.

When she looked back to the Doctor, she could not help but return his brash bold smile. Looking around she saw smiles on the faces of everyone - men, women and children, who were waving and cheering and whooping. But in the midst of all of this she also saw the look of melancholy that resided in Owlers downcast eyes.

Ibroc turned to face Rose and the Doctor again. "Come with me to the Village. You must both treat my home as your own."

"Village.?" Rose frowned at the Doctor, then wispered. "I thought they lived in trees."

The Doctor rolled his eyes. Then, (louder than Rose would of liked) he said. "Of course they don't live in trees. They have tails Rose, not feathers.!" He shared a smile with Ibroc, which Rose translated as 'women eh?'. Then pointing into the distance, he added. "It's over that way, to the left. You'll love it."

The Doctor and Ibroc set off along the length of the bridge, deep in conversation. Rose was left half way between irritation and confusion, but before she could make her mind up as to which side she was going to come down on, she decided she had better catch up to the Doctor sooner rather than later.

They had crossed the length of five or six of the bridges before they finally stopped, apparently at a dead end - a giant tree. It was much larger than any of the others Rose had seen. But from where Rose stood she couldn't see a ladder. She made her way forward but still couldn't see it.

"Doctor where's the ladder.?"

The Doctor glanced over his shoulder to her and gave her a carefree grin. "There isn't one, we're waiting for the lift."

"The lift.?" Rose repeated, and then. "You made me climb up a soddin ladder and all along there was a..." She stopped talking, wishing she hadn't started. He was pulling her leg. He had to be. Wasn't he?

She moved forward, pushing past the Doctor so that she could see what he could see.

"Bloody Hell."

It was a wheel - of sorts. Like the big wheel at a fairground, but much bigger. From what Rose could make out it was made of rope and wood, and instead of the rocking seats of a ferris wheel it had wooden platforms, each one suspended by several thick ropes. The wheel itself seemed to be connected to another much smaller wheel which was powered by... the waterfall.

Rose stared at the Doctor. "You have got to be kidding.!"

The first platform appeared infront of them and as Rose watched, Ibroc stepped out onto it, grasping hold of one of the securing ropes. He smiled at them as the wheel turned, lowering the platform away from them, on its way to the ground. Rose looked up. Above her there was another platform, slowly moving down towards them. An uneasy feeling began to grow in the pit of her stomach.

"You sure these things are safe.?"

"Course - they've been using them for hundreds of years." He stepped out onto the platform, then turned to look at her.

"That's what worries me."

The Doctor held out his hand and Rose took it. Stepping forward.

"Better.?" He asked. His lips softly brushing the word against her forehead.

Rose looked up into his eyes, knowing only that he was holding her in his arms again. "Yeah." She said.

Moving closer still, into the safety of his shadow, she rested her head against his chest and closed her eyes so that she could better hear the beat of his hearts.

"Loads." 


	3. A Moment Alone

A MOMENT ALONE

The platform which the Doctor and Rose were standing on, brushed softly against the grassy earth and they both stepped off as it moved up and away on it's journey to the heights of the tree tops again. It was with an almost awkward reluctance that they released their hold on eachother and walked side by side toward a smiling Ibroc, who was waiting for them a little way off. They were now in a green wilderness, cut in two by a swift river, (into which poured the waterfall). Trees and shrubs grew all around, although they were much smaller than the ones they had just left, infact they were quite similar to those growing on Earth, Rose thought, except that they were mostly blue with pale pink leaves.

For several minutes they walked together following the path of the river. Soon Ibrocs smile grew more warm than the sun as he looked into Roses face. "Our village is close by and you will be able to rest. Our welcome feast will continue long into the night."

Rose smiled back. "I'm looking forward to it. The Doctor was telling me how friendly your people were when..."

"We were set on by that raggy young upstart and his pointy stick wannabe warriors." The Doctor finished for her. "Who is he anyway.?"

"My son." Ibroc said.

"Oh." The Doctor paused. "Nice boy."

Ibroc laughed softly, shaking his head. "Owler is troubled... he is trying to find his way, and perhaps because he is the son of a Sage it is more difficult for him."

"I was meaning to ask you about that 'Sage' title." The Doctor said. "You weren't exactly Sage material when I was here last."

"I was headstrong... foolhardy." Ibroc agreed, full of regret. "My thoughts were not centred."

"So what happened to change you?" Rose asked .

Ibrocs smile faded slowly away as memories ran though him. It was as if a shadow had darkened his heart. And Rose could not help but wish she had not asked the question.

"That is a story meant for another time... not a day of celebration. We cannot dwell on sorrows past."

Rose looked to the Doctor, and he nodded slightly. It seemed that for now at least he was content to let his friend keep his secret a little while longer.

"I couldn't agree more.!" The Doctor enthused, throwing his arms over Rose and Ibrocs shoulders. "Nothing should spoil a day of celebration... that's what I always say, isn't it Rose.?" He winked at her.

"Oh yeah, all the time." She agreed with a grin.

"Now, about this welcome feast... will there be party hats.?"

The Harkuns village was a sprawling, busy, colourful place. Everywhere Rose looked she saw happy people at their daily chores. Groups of men and women were at the river side, some in raft like boats, hauling in fish from the cool waters, others were carrying woven baskets filled with fruits. Children were running around barefoot, playing like little wild things, carefree and blissful. As more of the villagers saw the three of them approach, they would wave to greet them, and some of the children ran up to them with smiles filled with baby teeth. By the time Ibroc, the Doctor and Rose had reached the centre of the village, they had a large group of people circulating around them, all with faces alight with curiosity. Even though they had just arrived, Rose could feel the air of welcome which surrounded them. It was warm and almost real enough to touch.

"My children..." Ibroc announced. "This day we are all blessed by the Godess, as she sees fit to bring friends old and new into our lives." He held out a hand to introduce Rose and the Doctor to the Harkun villagers, who watched them with wide eyed interest.

The Doctor grinned madly and waved. "Hello !"

Rose smiled at a small boy with purple feathers in his hair. "Hello..." she said. "My names Rose." The child immediatly started to cry, before being swept up into the arms of his mother and comforted.

"And I'm the Doctor."

The Harkuns looked to Ibroc, their Sage, to confirm that what the Doctor had said was true. Ibroc merely nodded, but this was enough, as only moments passed before an unreasonably pretty young woman, who appeared to be about Roses age, came forward and handed her a large red flower that Rose recognised as the same honey scented bloom that grew in the Tree Temples.

"I offer blessings and good fortune to you both... Rose and the Doctor." The girls gleaming orange eyes lingered on the Doctor longer than Rose liked.

"My children, tonight we hold a feast of celebration and welcome... much is to be prepared." Ibroc said. It seemed that this was all the instruction the villagers needed, for no sooner had the words been spoken than they began to return to their work, leaving only the girl who had brought Rose the flower, still with them.

Ibroc placed a hand upon her shoulder. "My friends I am afraid I have much left undone. Kyte will show you to my home. She will tend to your needs gladly until I return. Rest well."

Rose kissed Ibrocs cheek before watching him walk off into a crowd and be absorbed by his adoring people. She smiled warmly to herself then turned to look at the Doctor, but he and Kyte were already setting off in another direction. As she watched them, Rose felt her smile fade like a pale winter sun.

Kyte was holding the Doctors hand.

Ibrocs house was large and warm, it was built with a dark wood and its roof was made up of a thick thatch of leaves and grasses. Inside it was decorated with woven wall hangings in rich colours. The same colours were used in the heavy woven flooring. There was no furniture as such, instead the floor was strewn with soft plump cushions of all sizes and colours and in the centre of the room burned a steady fire in a circle of pale oval stones. Instead of doors there were thick dark curtains, through which were rooms yet to be explored.

Kyte hung on the Doctors arm as she gazed adoringly up into his eyes, and told him in a hundred different ways how happy she was that he had returned to Harkun, what a great blessing it was to have him in the village, and how wonderful that nights welcome feast would be. The Doctor grinned like Alices friend the Cheshire cat, quite content to be fussed over. Rose silently seethed. The Doctors ego was big enough already and... she didn't like the way Kyte looked at the Doctor one bit. Not to mention the fact that both Kyte and the Doctor were completely ignoring her. Deciding that enough was enough, Rose walked up to them both and interupted Kytes hero worship.

"Well thanks for showing us to the house and everything... " She began with a busy note.

"It was my pleasure to accompany the Doctor and..."

"Yeah right." Rose butted in. "Anyway, job done eh."?

Kyte looked blankly into Roses face. "I do not understand."

Rose gave a frustrated sigh and glanced to the Doctor, who was frowning at her. "I just mean..."

"She means thank you very much for all that you've done and she's very grateful, but it's been a long day and she... we... would like to...rest now." The Doctor said.

"Oh." Kyte nodded. "Of course... I am so sorry. I shall leave you now." She bowed her head slightly at the Doctor and walked away, glancing back at the last moment to smile again at the Doctor. "But I will see you tonight, yes.?"

"Tonight, yes." The Doctor nodded.

Kyte left them then.

The Doctor turned to Rose. "What was that all about.?"

Rose shrugged and avoided his gaze. "Nothing...it was just what you said."

"You told her to get lost. Sling her hook. Get out. Exit stage left."

"No I didn't" Rose protested, then. "Yeah, ok I did."

"Apes.!" The Doctor shook his head then walked off to look around the room. "No manners."

A few minutes passed before Rose asked the question she had been chewing on. "Do you think she's pretty.?" She tried not to sound overly interested in his reply.

"Who.?" The Doctor was strolling around the room, picking up things, turning them over, shaking them, smelling them.  
Rose sighed. "That girl... Kyte."

"Oh." The Doctor said, peering into a huge ornamental pot. "Her."

"Well.?"

"S'pose." He shrugged. "If you like tails."

Rose smiled, feeling slightly better. She looked around the room they were in, watching the Doctor as he continued his investigations.

"Should you be doing that.?" She asked as the Doctor picked up and rattled a large box of... something.

"Yes." The Doctor said before opening the box to peer inside. "No." He added quickly and put it back where he'd found it.

"She likes you." Rose said.

"Who.?"

"Kyte."

"Oh."

"Is that all you're going to say.?"

The Doctor thought about it, then gave Rose a slow easy smile. "Everyone likes me."

"I noticed." Rose said. "Which is odd."

The Doctor looked dejected. "What's that supposed to mean.?"

Rose grinned at his hurt expression. "I just meant it's weird. This is the first world we've been too where they don't want to kill us."

The Doctor thought about it. "No one wanted to kill us on Covax 6." He remined her.

"No... but they wanted to put us in a Zoo.!"

"It was a very nice enclosure." The Doctor pointed out. "And we were going to be the star attraction... still can't see why you were so against it." Rose laughed, her heart filling with love for him as she watched him walk slowly towards her, his ready grin sitting easy at his mouth. He stopped inches from her, his smile drifting as he stared into her face.

"So what should we do now then.?"

"Dunno." Rose said, drowning in the depths of his eyes.

"Ibroc said we should... rest."

Rose felt her heart race. "Not really tired."

"Me neither." The Doctor whispered, his breath soft against her cheek as he moved a little closer.

Even though he knew that he shouldn't, he touched her long blonde hair, twisting his fingers through it, before staring into her eyes with a darkening gaze. He was tired of fighting his need for her. Worn down by refusing the desires of his hearts. But even as he was about to risk everything, he was still afraid. He was afraid of scaring away the most precious part of his existance.

"What do you want to do Rose.?"

Rose couldn't speak, think or even breathe with him this close. Wordlessly she shook her head, still caught by him, lost in him. Her Doctor. She didn't dare believe that any of this was real. He placed a hand on her hip and she felt its presence there burn through to her skin. Instinctively she moved closer, so that they were barely apart now. Her palm flat against his chest, against the beat of his hearts. It had to be real.

"Rose..."

She closed her eyes, losing herself in the sound of her name falling from his lips. All she could think about was the kiss that was promised on the air between them. She tilted her head slightly and felt his breath soft against her lips...

There was a sudden noise from behind her, and the moment was torn away instantly. She and the Doctor parted as though ripped in two. She stumbled back a step and then looked at the Doctor as her mind reeled from the loss of him. She had never seen him look so angry. In confusion she turned to see what he was looking at - or rather who.

Owler stood in the doorway of the room, staring silently at them. 


	4. Something Uncharted

SOMETHING UNCHARTED

Not saying anything, the Doctor continued to glare at Owler. For now at least he doubted that he even had the ability to form words, as his mind was still screaming in turmoil over what he had stupidly been about to do. Kissing Rose would have been a huge mistake. So in some part - a very small part, he was actually grateful for Owlers 'timely' arrival. But there was still a part of him... namely his weak, wanting, treacherous hearts, which ached and craved and suffered, because he no longer held her in his arms. Around him he felt the movement of time, a gentle sway, enough to bring clarity to his mind again, and he pushed away all thoughts of love and need and... perhaps not all thoughts. Even he was not able to push away the memory of Rose completely. But he could pretend. He was good at pretending.

His quick smile leapt to his defence. "So, we meet again." He glanced over Owlers shoulder."On your own this time.?"

Owler lowered his head for a second then looked directly into the Doctors eyes. "I came to apologise for my foolishness... I should not have behaved in such a way."

"No you shouldn't." The Doctor agreed. "Running around with pointy sticks... you'll only put someones eye out."

Owler glanced away slightly, as if he had grown accustomed to hearing similar criticisms. "I offer blessings of good fortune to you both and thank you for listening to my words."

"This apology... your idea was it.?" The Doctor cocked his head with interest. "Or your fathers.?"

Owlers head lifted so that his eyes, which were filled with flames of gold, burned into the Doctors. "My words and thoughts are mine alone." He said defiantly.

The Doctor gave a lazy smile. "Okay then... apology accepted."

He braced himself before turning to look at Rose. He didn't know what he would see in her eyes, that was the worst part. What if she stared at him with loathing, disgust, hate... or worse still what if she didn't. He had to be prepared for every eventuality and he only had a hearts beat (or in his case two) to do it in. Pretend he thought, pretend, go on you can do it. But then he was looking at her, and dying on the inside. Confusion. That's what he saw before she hid it away from his prying eyes. Hurt and worry and confusion. Like a bitter pill he swallowed down the pain that writhed within him, a punishment for what he had done, or almost done... he wasn't sure.

"Rose." He said, amazed at how normal his voice sounded. "You remember Owler... on the bridge, too big for his boots." He flashed a quick grin to Owler. "No offence."

Rose moved forward. "Yeah, I remember." She didn't look at the Doctor, but instead walked across to Owler and offered her hand. "Forgive and forget eh.?"

Silently Owler took Roses hand, lifting it to his lips and brushing a soft kiss to her fingers. Letting her hand go he stared deep into her eyes then smiled warmly. It was the first real smile either the Doctor or Rose had seen from him, and it had the unexpected result of making him even more handsome.

The Doctors skin prickled as he watched Owlers eyes flicker with interest over Rose, taking everything in at once, her hair, her eyes, her smile, her curves. The Doctor looked away. He knew he had no right to feel jealous. But he felt it. It ripped though him, invading every cell of his body like a poison that would slowly, painfully kill him if he let it. Briefly he considered ripping Owlers head off - that would at least make him feel better. But he reluctantly dismissed the idea... for now at least. However, he wasn't just going to stand there and watch him make goo-goo eyes at HIS Rose. Even if she wasn't... his.

"Owler." He said a little too loudly. "I was thinking, nice day like this, we shouldn't waste it indoors. How about we see what your fathers up to.? I'm sure he'll be delighted to see we've..." He struggled to find the right words. "...well anyway I'm sure he'll be delighted."

They walked together, the Doctor and Owler, toward the doorway that led out into the bright sunlight. Then the Doctor heard a step behind him and he turned to look at Rose who was about to follow them.

"Er... Rose." He said softly. "Maybe you should stay here."

"Stay.?" Rose repeated with a frown. "But you just said..."

"I know but - you should rest." He attempted a grin, and hoped he pulled it off. "Big party tonight remember."

Rose stared wordlessly at him, then she nodded bleakly and walked back to where the small fire burned, as the Doctor and Owler left her.

Once they were gone Rose closed her eyes for a second. Determind that even though she was alone, she would not cry. She wouldn't. Ever. That was something she just wouldn't... she put a hand over her mouth and bit back the tears that threatened. But she did not cry.

She pushed back a curtain hanging in a doorway and walked through to a small room with a soft low bed on the floor. She lay down on it and curled up in her misery. Her head was spinning with everything she didn't have answers to. He couldn't really have been about to kiss her, she told herself, not really. She must have got it wrong. Even now as she tried to go over it in her head she couldn't exactly remember how it had happened - or hadn't happened. She'd probably got carried away with wishing that he would kiss her and twisted it somehow. It was no wonder he had wanted to get away from her. She groaned with self pity, and buried her head in the soft pillow. She wished that she was back at home, on her own bed, in her own room, on her own world. She wished that she had never even met the Doctor.

She opened her eyes at the moment of that thought, and knew she was kidding herself. She wouldn't change a thing, not one single moment of time that she had spent with him. A small smile played at the corner of her mouth before growing into a beaming grin. She felt as if her heart was about to burst. She loved him. And what's more - he HAD been about to kiss her. She was sure of it.

"Rose.?"

She thought she heard her name, but wasn't sure. Pushing it to the back of her mind she turned over sleepily. Anyway, her alarm clock hadn't gone off.

"Rose.!"

Okay, she had heard her name. She opened one eye, then the other, and gave a rich lazy smile. The Doctor was leaning over her, his face all handsome and... she smiled wider than before.

"Hello Doctor." She pushed a hand through her hair. "I feel like I've been asleep for a week."

"That would be the Varrah Flower." The Doctor explained as he took her hand and pulled her up off the bed."It's scent has a calming, restfull effect, especilly on those not used to it."

Rose rubbed her eyes, still sleepy. "That honey smell you mean.?" She yawned a little. "The flowers that grow in the Tree Temples.?"

The Doctor nodded as he watched her, unable to tear his eyes away. "Yes. The Harkuns grow the flowers there to promote tranquility and meditation in the Temples."

Rose shook her head awake and took a few unsteady steps, before grabbing the Doctors jacket sleeve as she stumbled over her feet. "Bloody dangerous thing to do if you ask me."

"Dangerous.?" The Doctor frowned.

" Growing knock-out flowers at 200 feet up."

The Doctor smiled. "Like I said, the Harkuns are used to them - you're not."

"What about you then.?"

"Oh I'm immune." He beamed.

"Course." Rose nodded her head."You would be." She realised at that moment that she was still clutching on to the leather sleeve of his jacket. She let go and smiled to herself.

The Doctor was quick enough to see the smile, and clever enough to see that there was something hiding behind it. But he decided not to press her on what it was she was keeping from him. He was just glad she was talking to him at all after the idiot he'd made of himself earlier.

"Hungry.?" He asked.  
Rose didn't have to think about it. "Starved." She said. "Honestly I could eat a..." She thought about the options, then smiled. "...Sahtahrian Bellox - a whole one."

The Doctor's eyes widend. "Really.? Well, I don't think the Harkuns have any on the menu - but I could ask them."

Rose grinned happily and punched his arm."Don't you dare.!

It was dark outside, but a giant white moon and a thousand million stars illuminated the purple night sky. A warm breeze blew through the village, like an afterglow of a hot summer day, and the air was filled with a banquet of wonderful things. Camp fires burned everywhere, and around them sat people busy in conversation, laughter and dancing. Rose could hear music too, a tribal sound of drums and pipes that made her blood tingle.

As she and the Doctor continued walking they came upon a group of children happily chasing eachother, and screaming with delight in their games. One girl ran up to Rose, her tail swishing wildly, and with the blessings of the Goddess, offered her a garland of yellow flowers. Rose put them over her head and glanced to the Doctor, who was unashamedly smiling at her.

"They're not going to make me fall asleep are they.?" Rose asked.

"Nope." He shook his head. "They're perfectly harmless." He reached out and removed one of the flowers from the garland, pushing it into Roses hair. "They're given as a complement - to those considered as beautiful as they are."

Rose blushed slightly, glad that the moonlight offered her some small protection from the Doctors intense gaze. She smiled cautiously at him as she slipped her hand into his, their fingers interlocking as she did so. The Doctor smiled back before he even realised what he was doing, but by then it was too late.

"Doctor.!"

A voice disturbed his thoughts, and the Doctor glanced around in time to see Kyte arrive at his side, her smile wide and her mood tangibley cheerful.

Rose looked her up and down, and with a blackening mood she noticed that Kyte was wearing even less than she had been earlier.

"Oh... Kyte, hello." The Doctor said, before being almost knocked back as Kyte threw her arms around his shoulders and kissed his lips in a over familiar greeting.

Stunned, Rose stood open mouthed as the Doctor let go her hand and made a grab for Kytes arms, pulling them from around his neck and then holding her firmly at arms length. For a moment he looked flustered.

"Friendly race, aren't they.?" He smiled at Rose as she glared darkly at Kyte, who seemed completely oblivious to Roses presence.

"I hoped I would see you again tonight Doctor." Kyte fluttered her long eyelashes. "I would have been so unhappy if I had not."

"Well." The Doctor said. "That's... um. Yes." He looked at Rose, his frantic eyes appealing for help.

Watching the Doctor fall apart like this, and finding it increasingly funny, Rose was almost tempted to let Kyte continue fawning over him. But at last she decided to take pity on him and moved forward, putting herself at the Doctors side, while she looked into Kytes eyes with a clear 'hands off or else' expression.

It was only then, with a petulant look to acknowledge Rose, that Kyte stepped back a little, and with a small sigh of relief the Doctor was able to release his hold on her. However her soft smile repeatedly strayed back to the Doctor. Infact Rose was just about to exhibit another display of what the Doctor called her ' ape manners', when they were joined by Ibroc, although even this failed to shift Kytes look of adoration.

"Kyte." Ibroc said softly. "Our guests would no doubt like a little Salloi wine with their food - perhaps you would be kind enough to fetch some.?" He suggested

The disapointment in Kytes face was obvious - even in moonlight. She nodded slightly. "Yes My Sage." Then disappeared into the night.

Shaking his head, Ibroc placed a hand on the Doctors shoulder. "You must forgive Kytes exuberance, she is young and this is her first season. It is a difficult and confusing time for her."

"Oh." The Doctor said, and then "OH.!"

"What.?" Rose said. "I mean sorry, but... what.?"

"Come sit by the fire, warm yourselves and eat well." Ibroc said, leading them both to a nearby campfire. The Doctor sat down with a broad grin on his face and Rose sat next to him with a frown on hers.

"Doctor, what's he mean.?" She asked.

"Apparently." He said, his silly smile growing wider still. "Young Kyte is looking for a mate. Now that she's old enough to... mate."

"You mean she wants to..." Rose couldn't finish the question, she just couldn't. So she asked another one. "But... why you.?"

"What do you mean - 'why me'.?" The Doctor asked, sounding hurt. "I happen to be a fine male speciman and... have you seen my ears.? It's no wonder the poor girl's driven crazy."

Eventually, when Rose had at last stopped laughing, she smiled at the Doctor and he smiled back. Then, remembering how hungry she was Rose looked at the food that was spread out before them. After a moment or two she opened her mouth to ask... just in case. But the Doctor cut her off before she had spoken a word.

"No Rose, they do not have chips."

Dejected, Rose picked up a small, pink, ripe (but as yet unknown) fruit. "Don't know what they're missing." She muttered to herself, and the Doctor smiled.

As he watched her he realised that he had fallen in love with Rose Tyler without even noticing. It had happened so easily, so naturally, that he couldn't remember when or how or why. But maybe that was how it worked. He didn't know. This was entirely new. Love was something uncharted. But the idea of having to make himself stop loving her - to make himself fall out of love. He was clueless as to how he could do that.

Which he had to admit, he found infuriating, considering how fantastically clever he was under normal circumstances. 


	5. Gone Fishing

GONE FISHING

"Did I die.?" Rose put her hands to her head. "It feels like I died." She said.

"You didn't die." The Doctor reassured her, handing her a small carved wooden cup. "Here, drink this."

Rose attempted to focus her eyes, then reached out and took the cup. "That's what you said last night." She accused.

"I didn't tell you to drink three bottles of Salloi wine." The Doctor pointed out.

"You didn't tell me not to either." She looked suspiciously at the cup in her hand. "What is it.?"

The Doctor folded his arms and grinned as he looked at her. "I mixed it myself. Two parts 'H', one part 'O'... don't have a name for it yet."

"Very funny." Rose said and lifted the cup to her dry lips. As water went, she had to admit it tasted pretty damn good. She drained the cup then held it out to the Doctor. "More." She said.

"Not till you get up and start walking around."

"Walk?" Rose repeated in disbelief. "I can't even stand."

The Doctor took her hands and pulled her upright. He held onto her, just in case. "See you're standing.!"

"Yay me.!" Rose said without much enthusiasm.

"That's my Rose." The Doctor said softly.

At these words Rose immediately lifted her head so that she was looking directly into the cool grey blue depths of the Doctors eyes. He smiled at her and put his hand to her forehead.

"How do you feel.?"

Rose considered the matter. "Semi alive."

"Good." The Doctor said."Semi alive is always better than semi dead. Don't you think.?"

Rose thought, but it hurt too much. "I don't remember getting drunk." She said in confusion. "I mean, I remember the drinking, but not the getting drunk."

"That's because you didn't get drunk." The Doctor explained. "You can't get drunk on Sallio wine. But any more than one bottle will give you a killer hangover."

"That's..." Rose struggled to find the words. "Bloody unfair."

"It is." The Doctor agreed."But, since you're okay, I'll be off then."

"What.?" Rose said. "Where are you going.?"

"Well." The Doctor shifted on his feet awkwardly. "Ibroc's asked me to go fishing and well... you wouldn't like it." He pulled a face to show how much she wouldn't like it. "You have to put the worm on the hook you see, and these worms - they're not like earthworms you know. They bright red and have teeth - sharp ones. They can put up a fight, sometimes with the fish. It's only because they taste nice that the fish dare to go after them in the first place." He smiled. "Well you know yourself - you ate a bunch of them last night."

"I ate worms.!" Rose said, far too loudly for her heads liking.

The Doctor nodded. "There was a bowl of them right infront of you. Long, red, thin." He said, trying to refresh her memory. "Of course they didn't have any teeth - the heads had been cut off before they were cooked."

"I thought... I thought it was a kind of pasta." Rose said in shock.

"Oh yeah." The Doctor nodded. "The Italian influence is very heavy around here. Infact there's a coffee shop around the corner - they do a fantastic cappuccino." He grinned at her.

"You think it's funny.?" Rose threw a cushion at him. "Out.!" She shouted, her head be damned. "Get out before I..."

"Going.!" The Doctor said cheerily, as he briefly disappeared from the room, only to put his head back through the curtain a moment later. "You'll be fine. Just drink lots of water and rest. Doctors orders."

Rose threw another cushion at him. "Out.!"

A little while later, with the noise in her head having mellowed somewhat, Rose decided to venture beyond the curtain of her room and see what the house had to offer her bored mind. Although she had resigned herself to the fact that a TV or radio would be out of the question.

Walking through to the main room she was surprised to find Owler sitting by the fire, his hands busy with a bone needle mending a fishing net. On hearing her he looked up.

"Fine blessings to you Rose." He stood up smiling and dropped the net to the floor forgotten.

"Yeah." Rose said. "Um, blessings to you too." She put her hand to her head.

"Are you unwell.?" He sounded concerned, and came forward, briefly touching her face with cool fingertips. "I can send word for my fathers return - he is skilled with herbs and..."

"No." Rose shook her head."Thanks, but I'm fine." She could see that Owler wasn't convinced. So she tried again. "Honestly it's just a hangover."

Owler frowned. "I do not know that word."

Rose struggled for a second. "Three bottles of Salloi wine." She said lamely.

Owler smiled at her."Oh." He said, understanding. "That was not... wise."

Rose couldn't help but laugh, her own smile answering his. "Yeah, tell me about it."

"You wish for me to tell you about drinking Salloi wine.?" Owler said, a little confused.

"What.? Oh, no, I didn't mean..." She sighed. "Never mind."

"My people have a cure for the pains in your head." Owler said as his eyes flickered over her.

"A cure.?" Rose said hopefully. But suddenly remembering the worms she had eaten, she couldn't help but wonder if this cure might be worse than the hangover itself. "What is it.?"

"Not far from here grow trees with black bark. If we can find a sapling, all we need do is remove a strip of its bark and stew it down with a little water over a fire. You need only to sit a while breathing in it's vapours to clear your head."

Rose considered the matter."So how come the Doctor didn't mention this cure then.?"

"The Doctor doesn't know everything." Owler said, in a voice that made Rose wonder exactly what he meant.

"Tree bark." She said. "You just boil it up and breath it in, yeah.?"

"Yes."

"Ok." She gave a broad smile and saw it returned ten fold. "Let's go."

Ibroc reeled in his third fish of the morning while the Doctor watched, fishless on the river bank. Ibroc smiled widely at him. "Perhaps it would help if you changed your bait." He glanced at the Doctors fishing line that trailed out into the depths of the water, but had yet to recieve even one curious bite. "I have more than enough taccah worms here for us both to use."

The Doctor folded his arms. "You know I can't do the worm and hook thing." He said, glad that Rose wasn't around to hear. "It's just too... violent."

Ibroc smiled, shaking his head. "But this bait of yours... I have never heard of it, and to be honest my friend I do not think the fish have either."

"Yes, well that's the plan - surprise the fish with something they've never seen before." He nodded toward the waters. "Any minute now, you'll see."

Ibroc looked out to the place where the fishing line remained still and gentle. "This plan of yours... it is to surprise the fish so much that they leap from the waters into your basket.?"

The Doctor unfolded his arms and faced his friend. "I'll have you know I've had enormous succsess in the past with my bait and resent the implication that it's a dud."

Ibroc nodded respectfully. "I am sorry my friend." He leant down and reached into the Doctors pot of bait, removing one and looking at it with interest. "What is it called, this bait of yours."

The Doctor closed the distance between them and took back the object Ibroc was holding, dropping it back into the pot with the others. "It's called a tea bag." He said in hushed tones. "And it's top secret." He added, tapping his nose."So, not a word to Rose. Let her think we caught all the fish with the worms."

Ibroc considered the matter. "We DID catch all the fish with worms." He said.

"So far." The Doctor corrected, rubbing his hands together as he looked expectantly toward his fishing line."But any minute now..."

Ibroc nodded, a smile twitching at his lips. But soon he was busy reeling in his fourth fish of the morning, and so decided to leave his friend unchallenged.

"Tell me Doctor, the girl who travels with you. Are you fond of her.?"

The Doctors senses prickeled, as they always did whenever he was asked awkward questions. "Of course." He said, aware that 'fond' barely scratched the surface of his feelings for Rose. "Why do you ask.?"

Ibroc pulled in his fishing line and sat down on the warm earth next to the waters edge. The Doctor sat down next to him, awaiting an answer.  
"Do you remember how I was when we first met.?" Ibroc asked.

"Course." The Doctor said. "It wasn't that long ago."

Ibroc smiled."No, it wasn't. Sometimes it just seem that it was. I have changed so much. Grown, matured, gained wisdom, and all of this because of the love of my wife." He looked at the Doctors face. "I see what you attempt to deny even to yourself. I see how much this girl means to you"  
The Doctor suddenly found the river of enormous interest. "I don't know what you mean." He said.

"I know because I have lived it." Ibroc said simply. "My wife died when Owler was still a child."

At this the Doctor looked to Ibroc, anger burning in his eyes. "It's different." He said fiercly. "What I am is different. Rose is... she ." He closed his eyes for a moment, trying to stem the agony within him. "How can I let myself love her, knowing that she will die and I will go on living.? That every day after the day that I bury her is a day my lungs will breathe in air I dont want, forcing me to draw breath after breath after breath."

"You do it because not to is a worse existance."

"She will die." The Doctor said. "Don't you understand.?"

"I understand all too well." Ibroc looked across the river waters. "My wife... she was not Harkun."

The Doctor looked at his friend, and shook his head. "No, that can't be."

"Lanti was an off worlder Doctor. To begin with I begged her to leave, but she would refuse time and time again. She said that her place was with her heart, and because she had given her heart to me, she could not leave."

The Doctor stared at Ibroc. "She understood the risks.?"

Ibroc nodded slowly. "For a short while all I knew was joy, and then she was gone from me. Her body may have turned to dust, but she lives on in my heart, and in the eyes of our son." He smiled softly, as if warmed by a memory. "Not once did she regret the choice she made."

Clearly shaken, the Doctor got to his feet and stood for a second looking out to the waters infront of him. Eventually he looked back at his friend, his eyes dark with confusion.

"I... I need time to think." He said then he turned and began to walk away, following the path of the river. 


	6. Potions and Procrastinations

POTIONS AND PROCRASTINATIONS

Owler carefully stirred the mix of black tree bark and water in a clay dish he had brought with him, then set it back onto the small fire he had made. The unpleasant mixture was now a thick lumpy black treacle with a strong and bitter aroma. Rose couldn't help but be grateful that all she had to do was breath it in, as she doubted that even Mary Poppins reccomendation of a spoon full of sugar would be of any help to the taste of this medicine. She moved a little closer to the fire and peered dubiously into the dish, watching the thickening liquid begin to bubble and pop. She glanced at Owler, as he came to sit next to her at the fire side. "So what's the next ingredient.?" She asked. "Eye of newt.?"

"Newt.?" Owler repeated with a frown. "What is newt.?"

"It's... not important." Rose smiled. "Anyway, wing of bat would probably work better."

Owler looked into the clay dish. "It is almost ready. I think."

"Great." Rose said, not sure if she meant it.

"It should ease your head soon after you have breathed in the vapour."

"Ease it.?" Rose said. "What happened to cure it.?"

"This is a strong medicine, but its making must be carefully balanced. I am not a true healer like my father. So it may not fully remove your... hangover." He gave a smile, proud of his use of this new word.

"But you said it would cure it. I distinctly remember the word cure coming up in the conversation." She sighed, suddenly willing to risk any taste, with or without sugar, just as long as it got rid of the man with the hammer who had taken up squatters rites in her head.

"I can make it stronger." He said, a note of reluctance in his voice.

"There's a but isn't there.?" Rose said. "There's always a but."

"But..."

"Knew it."

"You are not Harkun... it may not work at all." Owler looked to the ground.

As Rose watched him, she realised that he had not wanted to tell her this, because he had wanted her to believe in him. He had wanted to impress her, not with a flash car, or expensive trainers, or the latest mobile phone, but simply with his ability to take away her pain. He had wanted to do that for her, but perhaps more than that he had wanted her to believe that he could. Rose suddenly saw Owler as he saw himself, the son of a Sage, forever in shadow, always a step behind, and heavy with burden on young shoulders. He had wanted only to succeed in making this healing potion for her, and in doing so perhaps please his father.

"I trust you." Rose said softly. "Ok maybe it won't work. But at least you're trying. I bet that one day you'll make a great Sage."

Owler looked up, a smile lighting his face. "You honour me with your words." He got to his feet and withdrew a knife from his belt. "I will make it stronger - for you." He set off toward the sapling tree which he had taken bark from, and upon reaching it he pushed the tip of his knife blade under the wounded bark into the soft woody flesh of the tree. As Rose watched she saw a clear sticky liquid trickle out from the wood and run the length of Owlers blade. When Owler returned to the fire side he held the blade out to her.

"The Jahtra trees sap is a powerful form of medicine." He scraped the blade across the rim of the clay pot that was still on the fire. "My father says it is the most precious gift the Goddess Harku ever bestowed to her people." He said with respect.

Hearing a loud hissing sound, Rose looked to the mixture in the clay pot. It had suddenly begun to fizz wildly, like something from her school chemistry lessons. She couldn't prevent a small smile, as she wondered what Mr Jackson would think of this experiment - safety glasses no where in sight. As she watched, a swirling cloud of grey steam began to lift into the air from the black mixture, along with the most revolting smell Rose had ever come across. Instinctively she covered her nose and mouth with her hand, already half choaking on what she had briefly inhaled. Owler quickly pulled her hand away. "No.!" He insisted. "You must breath it in if it is to heal you."

For a second Rose stared at him, horrified. But she knew she had to do it, perhaps more so for him than even herself. She had said that she trusted him and she had meant it. She pushed back her hair and closing her eyes she leant over the fizzing mixture, taking slow heavy breaths of its swirling putrid steam.

The more the Doctor thought about it the less it made sense. The less it made sense the more he realised he had to do it. Sooner or later he was going to have to tell Rose he loved her. Probably later, because sooner was... too soon. He needed time. He had to get something this important right. There was no room for mistakes. He couldn't just blurt it out, if he did she was more than likely to run home to Jackie, or worse still to Mickey.

He suddenly stopped walking as he re-played that last thought. He shook his head, a confident grin taking up residence at his mouth for a second. No, he thought, she wouldn't do that. His grin faded away. Would she.? He started walking again.

All the more reason to get it right he determind. Telling someone you love them was a serious business. Love... how had that happened he wondered. He'd breezed through his life having adventures, risking life and limb, in and out of deadly peril at the drop of a hat. He'd bumped into countless species along the way. He'd liked them, grown fond of them, even missed them a little when they were gone. But not love. He'd never loved. Not till Rose.

Then of course there was the flip side of this particular romantic coin to consider. The part he didn't want to think about, but knew he had to. What if Rose didn't feel the same.? What if he made a complete prat of himself on epic proportion, professing his steadfast, enduring, utter devotion and love to her only to have her say the words that have slain many a man... 'can't we just be friends'?. He shuddered.

It was a risk he had to take. He could do it. He was a risk taker. It wasn't like he was a stranger to risks. He'd taken plenty. Red wire or blue wire - that was always a good one. Not that Rose had any wires. It would be easy if she had - he'd cut the red one of course. Or the blue one. Damn, which one was it.? He stopped walking again, and lifted his hands to his head, growning. Wires.? What was he thinking about wires for.? His hands dropped to his sides. This was insane, he thought. He'd become a gibbering idiot.

Rose lifted her head out of the stench steam, sure that she was going to throw up. She'd maybe taken a dozen or so big breaths, and figured she'd reached her limit, any more and - well it wouldn't be pretty. She put a hand over her mouth as the clean fresh air hit, and she almost lost the contents of her stomach there and then. She closed her eyes for a second, and sank backwards onto the soft green grassy earth. The scent of wildflowers drifted around her head as she opened her eyes slowly and blinked, gazing up into a perfect cloudless jade sky. A bird with violet and yellow feathers flew across her field of vision, and she let her hand slip down into the grass above her head as she lay breathing in the softly perfumed air. A slow smile grew at her mouth, until it became a wide and wanton grin.

The jade sky disappeared from sight, replaced by Owlers concerned face looking down at her. "Rose.?" His voice was tinged with concern.

Rose moved a little so that she was lying propped up by her forearms. She sighed, contented. "You're... fantastic." She laughed softly as she saw a warm blush creep into Owlers cheeks. "Honestly you're brilliant." Impulsivley she leant forward and brushed his surprised mouth with her lips in a sudden and fleeting kiss. She moved back, realising a second too late that she really shouldn't have done it. Owler stared wide eyed into her face, but before Rose could do or say anything, he moved to repeat the kiss. His lips took possession of hers, gently teasing a response. Then growing more sure his hand came to rest at her shoulder, pushing her down into the soft grass as his kiss intensified.

Rose knew nothing of the cold harsh eyes that watched her from across the river. She knew nothing of the pain that tore through the body of the man who saw her wrapped in anothers arms. She knew nothing of his suffering as he witnessed Owler take his kiss. She did not see him turn his face away, unable to bare the pain and grief of his wounded hearts a moment longer. She did not see him leave. She knew nothing of him.

It was like waking up from a dream. She wasn't sure if it was real or if she was still asleep. Then sunlight hit her eyes and she moved slightly, a small stone pressing into her shoulder. She felt a hand trail a lazy path up her back. Owler was kissing her.! Her mind wirred and reeled as she pushed her hands against his chest, forcing him back, breaking the kiss. She sat up, and looked at him accusingly.

"What the Hell was that about.?"

Owler looked confused."You kissed me."

"No I didn't.!" She protested, outraged. She frowned and put her hand to her head suddenly feeling dizzy. She looked at Owler as the feeling passed as quickly as it had begun. "Yes I did." She corrected herself quietly, as if she had only just remembered. "Sorry, I shouldn't have done that."

Owler moved forward. "I liked it." He said softly.

"Well you shouldn't have.!" Rose snapped. "I can't be kissing you.!"

He looked hurt, and his tail thumped the ground. "I thought you... liked me."

"I...I do." Rose said, feeling awful. "But I love the Doctor.!"

The instant she spoke the words Rose slapped both her hands over her mouth, and wide eyed she stared horrified at Owler. It was the first time she'd ever actually said the words out loud. But what worried her was why she had said them. She was sure she hadn't meant to. Slowly she lowered her hands from her mouth and looked intently at Owler.

"Ask me a question." She said reluctantly.

Owler frowned a little. "What kind of question.?"

"Anything." She said. "Just do it."

He frowned a little more."What is your name.?"

Rose thought about it. "Rose." She said sadly. "Another." She prompted.

"Where do you come from.?"

Rose hesitated. "Earth." She said unhappily. "Another"  
"How did you get here.?"

"In the TARDIS." Rose said miserably.

Owler didn't wait for another prompt. "What do you feel for the Doctor.?"

Roses eyes filled with threatening tears. "I love him." She said in utter despair.

Owler looked worried. "Rose, what is it.?"

"It's the potion." She explained. "Turns out it has a slight side effect on humans. It makes you tell the truth. I can't lie... I tried, I really tried." Her tears welled in her eyes. "Owler what am I gonna do.?"

The Doctor found Ibroc exactly where he had left him, at the river side, catching yet another fish. For a while both men stood together in silence, their concentration fixed on the waters. Ibroc was the first to speak, but he did not yet look at the Doctor.

"You are troubled my friend."

"I thought about what you said."

"You thought about your feelings for Rose." Ibroc corrected him, almost as if he knew his thoughts.

"Yes." The Doctor nodded slightly. "Rose." He stopped suddenly, as even her name at his lips stung him.

"Have you reached a conclusion.?"

"Yes." He said, his head lifting, his shoulders pulling back, his eyes turning to a shade of steel.

"Doctor.?" Ibroc turned to face his friend now.

"Bad idea." He said simply."Very bad idea." 


	7. Truth and Lies

TRUTH AND LIES

Rose stood at the waters edge, small stones clenched tight in her hand. Every so often she would throw one of them into the river, watching the splash and then the ripples. Once the waters had returned to calm glass again, she would repeat the action. Absent mindedly she kicked at the grass with her foot while she waited for the water to still again. Owler came up behind her, and she glanced over her shoulder at him, saying nothing, then looking back at the river. She lifted her hand, a flat smooth stone gripped tight in her fingers. Owler reached out and covered her hand with his, bringing her arm back down to her side.

"I'm sorry Rose."

She turned and looked at him. "It's not your fault." She said flatly. "You weren't to know."

"Come eat, the fish is cooked."

Rose looked over to where Owler had cooked two fresh caught fat green fish, while she had stood sulking. "Smells good." She admitted.

"It is good." He smiled and tugged at her hand. Rose reluctantly followed, dropping the stones to the ground.

They sat down next to the fire and Owler handed Rose a large thick waxy green leaf, the size of a dinner plate, on which was her fish, not green anymore but bright yellow. She looked at it. Just a fish she thought. Not worms. Then she put a little into her mouth, and chewed.

Owler watched her carefully as he also began to eat. "Good.?" He asked.

"Hmmm... good." She smiled at him, then frowned slightly, realising something. "Funny though... it tastes like chicken."

"It is a Kua Jut fish - it tastes different to everyone. Its flavour depends on who eats it." Owler explained. "To you it tastes like chicken. But to me it tastes of Gatt Mahgg."

"What's Gatt Mahgg.?" Rose asked.

"It is a sea snake that grows bigger than a man. It has a mouth that sucks in it's prey, holding it in its stomach where it is slowly digested. It takes weeks sometimes. Then it throws up the bones."

"Remind me never to go swimming around here." Rose said pulling a face.

"Rose.?"

"Mmm.?" She said, her mouth full of fish.

"What is chicken.?"

Ibroc picked up his basket of fish, pulling its strap over his head and around his shoulder. His heavy load secure, he looked at the Doctor who proudly carried one fat green fish in his hand.

"And you doubted my abilities." The Doctor said, waving the fish in triumph at his friend.

"I live and learn Doctor." Ibroc said humbly.

"And remember." The Doctor said tapping his nose with one finger and giving a sly wink. "Top secret."

Ibroc smiled as they set off on the walk back to the village. "I hope that Rose is feeling better by the time we return."

"Oh she is." The Doctor said quietly, then shot a sudden grin at Ibroc, hoping that his old friend would be taken in by his cheery manner. "You don't know her like I know her." He said, then wished with both his hearts that he hadn't. It had hurt him to say the words. Actual pain had torn into him with teeth and claws, as he realised he didn't know Rose at all, not anymore. Maybe he never had.

The day moved on slowly, the sun moving through it's arc in the jade sky above, until its light grew pale and sleepy. Yet by their camp fire Owler and Rose were hardly aware, as they talked as friends, learning more about eachother with every question.

"So, where's your Mum then.?" Rose asked. "Your Mother I mean." She corrected when she saw Owlers frown.

Owler shifted uncomfortably where he sat. "She's dead."

"Oh." Rose looked up trying to think of what next to say, something that would make it better somehow. But there wasn't anything.  
"I was a child, I barely remember her." Owler said.

Rose looked at him, knowing from the sadness in his eyes that he remembered more that he admitted to. "My Dad died." She said softly, wanting Owler to know that he wasn't alone in grief. "I didn't really know him. I remember him though." She smiled warmly as thoughts of Pete Tyler filled her head. "The Doctor helped me... "

"My Father told me about the Doctor when I was a child. He said he was a good man, a man to be trusted."

"He is." Rose murmured.

"Is that why you love him.?"

Rose stared at Owler, knowing that it was an unfair question given her present situation. "I think I loved him before I knew him. Funny, I just met him, this stranger and it was like... I trusted him. Next thing is I'm leaving everything I know behind me, to be with him. He saved my life just by taking hold of my hand."

Owler reached across and gently stroked Roses cheek. "Then why don't you want to tell him what is in your heart.?" His hand fell away.

"But I do.!" She said, surprised by her own words. She gave a slow warm smile, as she realised that it was true. Telling the Doctor how she felt about him was exactly what she wanted to do. She'd been afraid too long already. This was her chance to finally admit her feelings, and she was wasting it away hiding from him. She scambled to her feet, grinning. "Owler, I want to go back to the village. Right now.!"

Owler got up, standing infront of her. "Are you sure.?"

Rose grinned, moving to hug Owler tight in her arms. "Yes.!" She laughed.

"Very well." He said with reluctance. "But we must leave the land as we found it." He knealt down and began to clear away the remains of their meal. Frustrated and impatient, Rose joined him, better with two she though with a smile. She picked up his knife and pushed it into the belt of her jeans, then as Owler put out the small fire she took the clay dish to the river to wash it out. When she returned everything was done. She handed Owler the dish, and he put it into a small bag he carried over his shoulder. But she could tell he was troubled by something.

"What is it.?"

"What is your name.?" He asked, with his eyes fixed upon hers.

"You know my name it's..." She paused. "Mary." She could not prevent a smile from seizing possession of her lips.

"Where do you come from.?"

"The planet Krypton.!"

"How did you get here.?"

"Rode all the way on a pink elephant.!" With this Rose leapt at Owler, throwing her arms around his shoulders and laughing in delight.  
Owler held her close, breathing in the scent of her, learning the softness of her cheek against his. Suddenly becoming aware of what she was doing, Rose let Owler go, and stepped back awkwardly.

"Sorry." She said. "Got caught up in the moment." A stray smile escaped her lips.

"You don't have to do this." Owler said hesitantly."The potions side effect has passed."

"Yeah I do." Rose said. "And it's better this way. Now I'll tell him for the right reasons. Not because I have to, but cos I want to."

Owler nodded slightly."We should go back now, it's getting dark."

Rose looked around. It was getting dark. "Have we really been here all day.?" She asked in surprise.

"Yes." Owler answered, setting off in the direction of the village.

"Bloody Hell." Rose said as she caught up with Owler and fell into step at his side. "The Doctor's gonna be furious."

By the time they arrived back in the village it had become much darker. The sky was now a midnight blue colour, freckeled with pin pricks of emerging star light. The air around them was still warm, and the sleepy breeze that gently kissed their faces was soft and sweet scented. They walked past tall wooden posts, the tops tarred with a sticky black residue that had been set fire, burning to light the night. From them occasional bursts of sparks would crack and fly up into the air, like a sudden firework display. The people who they passed, offered smiles, greetings and blessings of the Goddess. Rose accepted each one until her heart was full. She smiled at Owler, wondering if he knew how lucky he was, to have never know pain or war or cruelty, or any of the countless horrors other races practiced until they mastered. She loved this world. She felt warmth everywhere, in everything, in everyone. It really was a paradise she thought. A place of goodness.

There was a group of perhaps twenty or so people outside Ibrocs house, all talking, eating and drinking. Rose noticed Kyte was among them, and with a stir of jealousy she tried to catch sight of the Doctor, thinking that it was unusual for Kyte to have let him slip away from her. But try as she might, she couldn't see the Doctor anywhere in the crowd. She felt a touch at her shoulder, and spinning around, a smile flying to her lips she looked up into the eyes of, Ibroc. Her smile flickered then faded away with her hopes.

"Rose." He said softly. "Are you well.? When we returned to find you gone..."

"It is my fault Father." Owler interupted. "I should not have gone without leaving word."

"It's no-ones fault." Rose corrected, her eyes intent on Owler. Before her attention returned to Ibroc. "Owler made a potion to cure my head. You should be proud of him."

Owler stared at Rose wide eyed, surprised that she had spoken so. Then he cautiously looked to his father.

Ibrocs smile was warm, and his hand moved to sit on Owlers shoulder, as he looked deep into the boys eyes. "I am always proud of my son." He said. "And if he has the makings of a healer... then I am prouder still."

Sensing a father son bonding moment, Rose walked away, milling through the group of people, looking into face after face, knowing she had to find the Doctor eventually. Her hand was caught and she turned slightly, hoping again.

It was Owler. "I wanted to wish you luck." He said. "And to thank you for what you said."

Rose smiled. "Anytime." Then she sighed. "I can't see the Doctor anywhere, though."

"My Father say's he is inside the house"  
Rose looked at the doorway, then back to Owler, unable to control her smile. She leant forward and kissed his cheek, then tried to go, but he still held her hand, holding her there.

"You're sure.?" He asked.

Rose smiled at him, touched by his concern. "More than I've ever been about anything." She said.

He let go her hand, and without looking back, Rose turned to run into the house.

Rose pushed back the curtain to her room, walking inside and smiling when she saw the Doctor. He was sitting on the floor, his head bowed, his back firmly against the wall, his legs drawn up slightly, long arms stretched out infront of him, hands at his knees. He did not look up.

Rose hesitated, the wind knocked out of her sails by this reactionless Doctor. "Don't be angry with me." She half teased. "Doctor.?" Then she sighed heavily, wondering how she had fallen so deeply in love with a man who could sulk like a two year old. But then she smiled, not caring, because she did love him. With all her heart. What else mattered.?

She moved forward and touched his fingers, only to have him jerk his hand away from her, as though she had burnt him. Startled she looked at him, confused, even a little afraid. What was wrong.? This was more than sulking. This was... anger.

He looked up then, meeting her eyes with his, except they weren't his. They had turned to the darkest grey, almost black, but worse than that, Rose could see he was barely able to look at her.

"Had fun today have you.?" It wasn't even his voice, not really.

She felt suddenly cold."What's that supposed to mean.?"

Saying nothing, the Doctor got to his feet and walked past her, out of the room. Alone, Rose turned to stare after him, but all she saw was the sway of the curtain as he left her. Snapping out of her daze she set off in pursuit, her temper rising.

He was standing in the main room, by the fire, his back to her, hands deep inside his jacket pockets as he watched the flames intently. Rose walked up to him.

"Is this something to do with Owler.?" She asked, touching his arm. "I know you don't much like him, but he's not that bad once you get to know him..."

He turned and looked at her. His face painted with surprise. "Oh.!" He said pointedly. "So that's what you've been doing...'getting to know him'."

Rose frowned, she didn't understand where this was coming from. "What the Hell's got into you.?"

"I should have expected as much." The Doctor said. "You being a friendly girl... new planet new boyfriend, is that the idea.?" He smiled as if he didn't care that he was being cruel.

He had to be cruel he thought, if he was, then she'd never look at him with soft sweet eyes again... maybe she'd even run home, if he hurt her enough. She'd sit at the kitchen table with Jackie and drink tea, and listen to her Mum tell her how she was better off out of it. Gadding about with an alien, putting herself in danger... when she could have a nice boy like Mickey. No contest really. He closed his eyes for the smallest of moments. He didn't want to do this, any of it, but he had to make her go. Then she wouldn't be there to see him crawl away to some dark corner of the universe and lick his wounds, until he forgot how much he loved her.

"Are you... are you calling me a slapper.?" Rose could hardley believe it.

"Fine looking boy like Owler, It's only natural you'd go all moon eyed over him."

"I do not go moon eyed.!" Rose protested.

"Do."

"Not.!"

"Do."

Rose crossed her arms and glared at him. The Doctor felt a cold shiver run the length of his spine, as for a second he caught sight of something flicker in Rose he hadn't ever seen before. Oh yes, he thought with no small degree of alarm, - she was definately her mothers daughter. He almost had her he thought, just one more push was all it would take.

"Let's see, first Mickey... well I doubt he was the first." He winked at her. "Then Adam... and now Owler. The notches on your bedpost are gonna make it look like it has woodworm if you keep this up." He leant in a little closer, seeing the begining of tears deep within her eyes. "You know, a girl can get a reputation... even in space."

She slapped him.

He felt the sting burn. But he didn't flicker, and he saw her first tear fall. He'd won. But he felt no pride in his victory. Her tears shining in her eyes tortured him more than he'd expected them to - and he had expected them to. But nothing like this.

Rose turned and ran from the house.

Outside she ran through people, bumped into arms and shoulders blindly, not caring, not thinking, all she wanted was to get away. She heard her name called out, but ignored it, instead brushing away her tears and running into the night, as it darkend around her.

Ibroc caught his sons arm, holding him back from giving chase. "Let her be." He said softly.

"She needs me.!" Owler said, pulling away slightly.Yet his fathers hold remained firm.

"No my son. Her heart is not yours."

Owler stared after Rose, who had already vanished into the darkness. "She ran from him." He said in confusion.

"Yet it is him she loves." Ibroc released Owlers arm, giving him the choice of what he should do next.

Owler looked toward the house, and then back to his father in silent acceptance. He nodded.

Ibroc handed Owler a green leaf, on which a bright yellow fish lay, still steaming from the fire. "Take the Doctors fish to him... it took him long enough to catch it, he should eat it."

Reluctantly Owler took the fish and began walking to the house.

"My Father thought you might be hungry Doctor, he asked me to bring you the fish you caught."

The Doctor turned and looked at Owler, taking the fish from him in silence, and putting a morsal into his mouth. He had expected Owler to go, but he didn't.

"Tell Ibroc thank you." He chewed on the fish, then frowned a little. "Cabbage.?"

Owler stared darkly at the Doctor.

The Doctor, having had more than enough of Owler, put the fish to one side and moved forward until they were face to face. Just as they had been that day in the Tree Temples. The more things change, the more they stay the same, he thought bleakly.

"Is there something I can help you with.?" He asked. "Because if there is, by all means ask away."

Owler remained silent.

"No.?" The Doctor said. "Cat got your tongue.? Well if you don't mind I think I'd like to be alone."

Owler almost turned to leave, almost, but at the last moment he changed his mind, instead lifting his head so that his yellow eyes blazed into the Doctors.

"She came to you and offered her heart.!" He said angrily. "How could you reject her.? How is it you care so little for her that you would make her run into the night blind with tears.?"

The Doctor could do nothing but stare wordlessly into Owlers face, as his mind tried to make sense of the words. But it made no sense. It was all wrong, that hadn't happened - Rose hadn't... His head lifted a little. Suddenly he was cold, as realisation hit him like an icy blast. A ragged breath escaped from his lungs and his stone hearts crumbled to dust.

"Rose..." He said softly, her name his own salvation, bringing him to life again.

"I would be glad of a love so fierce. If she wanted me... but she does not." Owler fixed the Doctor with a cold gaze."My Father tells me you are a wise man, but he is wrong. You are a fool."

At last understanding, the Doctor nodded. "Yes I am." He said. "I'm a bloody idiot."

Ibroc could not help but smile as he saw the Doctor run out from the house, his face lit with fevered determination, his sharp eyes searching the faces of the people around him. Seeing Ibroc, the Doctor seized his friends arms, holding him before him.

"Rose." He said, his features wild."Where is she.. have to find her..tell her." He looked up to the moon and grinned before staring back into his old friends face. "I've been a idiot. You were right... should have listened - you're always right." He grinned again, then sped off, stopping suddenly to look back to point at the house. "That boy... I'm starting to warm to him." Then he shot off again.

Ibroc stood where he was, smiling, patiently waiting. A second later the Doctor was back, still frantic.

"Which way.?" He asked, and Ibroc pointed in the other direction.

The Doctor grinned, and then was gone.

He hurried over soft grassy earth, through dark branches, and then came out into a dry barren area, the ground no longer grassy, but scattered with stone and wild parched weeds that struggled for life in a unloving soil. Even the trees were hungered and starved, looking like sarecrows, or haunted creatures from nightmares, casting shadows on the dark ground. The moon was his only light, and that it seemes was fleeting, as clouds passed over its face . Sometimes he could only glimpse a few feet infront of him. He thought that he had better slow his pace, as the stones underfoot moved like marbles, rolling and scattering away. After he'd walked into a tree for the third time, he cursed under his breath, wishing he'd brought a torch with him. He stopped, then smiled, pushing his hand into his jeans pocket and pulling out the sonic screwdriver. He fiddled with it for a second, then a sharp blue light hit him in the eye, as it came on suddenly. He squinted, half blinded for a second, then shone the bright blue light infront of him, taking cautious steps forward.

He heard a scream, and his blood ran cold. Rose. He began to run.

He stopped suddenly, his eyes wildly searching. His hands clutched at the branch of a dead tree that hung like a broken arm over a steep cliff edge. He couldn't see her. He closed his eyes for a second, absorbing the darkness, learning it. He heard a slight moan, soft and filled with pain. His eyes snapping open again and he scrambled desparetly down the cliff, clutching at rock and tufts of grass , whatever he could snatch at that would slow his rapid descent, into hell.

When he found her he fell to his knees beside her broken body. She lay like a childs disgarded doll, her eyes closed, her hair half covering her pale face, her lips flushed with a painted kiss. She was still and cold and lifeless.

The Doctor reached out and pushed back her hair from her face, sure that she would open her eyes then, and look at him. He felt a warmth at his fingertips, and saw them covered with rich dark blood, even her hair, where he had pushed it from her face, was matted with its redness. He groaned desparetly and drew her into his arms, hearing a noise as he did so, the sound of metal against stone. He looked at the ground, as the moon took pity on him, allowing him to see a knife blade covered with blood fall from where he had moved her. He did not have time to think, as the next thing was he heard her moan softly, no more than a breath. But a breath was life.

He put his hand to her wound, pressing down into it. He had to stop the bleeding. She made another sound, a cough and then a gasp of air from her lungs escaped between them. Her eyes rolled open and she stared into the darkness.

"Stay with me Rose.!" He urged, frantically willing her with all his being to please do as he asked for once - just this once. "Stay with me.!" He pulled her in close to him. His hands soaked in her blood, as he desparetly, uselessly tried to stop the bleeding.

Stay with him.? Rose thought. Stay with her Doctor. She felt cold.

He was rocking her gently in his arms and kissing her face, her eyes, her cheek, her unresponsive lips..., and was he crying.? Why was her Doctor crying.?

"Rose.? Rose.! Please stay with me.!"

She was so cold now, so very cold. But she didn't understand why.

The last thing she knew was the salt water taste of his tears, as they fell against her silent lips. 


	8. The Dead and the Undecided

THE DEAD... AND THE UNDECIDED

The early morning prayer bell rang out through the village, calling the faithfull to the Tree Temples. Where they would give thanks to the Goddess, and she in turn would bless them for their worship of her. Or so the story go's.

Its dull heavy note barely disturbed the Doctors thoughts, as he sat on the ground outside Ibrocs house, his head in his hands. As the last note died on the air, he raised his head, his hands falling to the dry dusty earth. His eyes were dark and unmoving as he stared into the distance. He was a broken soul, shattered into fragments that were spinning like a whirlwind in his head, and yet to even the most watchful eye, he appeared as empty as death. Infact his only consession to life was the slow and reluctant rise and fall of his chest, as his lungs forced him to take breath after breath after breath. He wondered if he could choose not to breathe. Could it be that simple?

There were people who passed him on their way to the Tree Temples who looked at him, pity in their hearts and eyes. Many threw flowers to the ground around the house as they walked by - as was their custom. An offering of sincere blessings to those within. One flower, a small insignifigant yellow petaled bloom, fell at the Doctors feet and he stared down at it, remembering a time when he had placed one like it into Roses hair. The memory tore a breath of life out from him into the warm air, and he reached down to pick up the bloom from the dry ground. Staring at it, he rolled its stem between his finger and thumb, so that it turned like a golden dancer in the sunlight. A dark smile twitched at his mouth, reluctant and bitter. It was only then he noticed his hands, still stained with Roses blood from the night before. He dropped the flower, and closed his eyes as he sank tortured into cruel memory.

"Doctor?"

He opened his eyes, his head twisting to the side as he sought out the speaker. If there had been one at all. He had emerged from a darkness which had been long and filled with nightmares. Voices from his past had called to him a hundred times. Some had mocked and jeered him, others had been screams he had heard countless times before, yet they had never disturbed him so much as they had that night. Even Roses voice had crept into his ear, whispering that she was lost, that she was cold. Unable to bare her pain, he had opened his eyes, and the silence had returned. He had not know if he was grateful for that, or not.

But now, in the bright daylight of a new morning, this voice was real. The Doctor stared at Ibroc, then somehow pulled himself upright. His legs almost buckled under him, as they had been sat still all night, and at first, movement was raw and painful, although he did not care enough to aknowledge it. He only wanted to hear the voice, the words. He did not ask. He waited. He listened. Somehow he even dared to hope.  
"She has stopped bleeding." Ibrocs face was worn and ashen. He had been at Roses side throughout the night, ever since the Doctor had carried her broken body back to the village.

"Is she awake?" The Doctor already knew the answer, but he had to ask. He had heard of miracles, and hoped for one.

Ibroc shook his head."She has almost slipped away from me a hundred times."

The Doctor nodded. How many times had he thought he had lost her, as he had carried her back to the village? A hundred? A thousand? In the end it hadn't mattered anymore. He had found her, and that had been enough for him - for a while.

He had carried her in his arms, his hand pressed into her wound, feeling the slow pulse of her body against him. Her head had been resting at his shoulder, and sometimes he had heard her moan in pain, making him wish that she could find some release from it. But as her silences became longer, he had soon craved for the return of her soft crys of breath, at least they comforted him that she was still alive.

"She clings to life. She refuses to let go. She is strong of heart." Ibroc looked into the Doctors face as he impressed the words upon him.  
Again the Doctor nodded his head. "She's a fighter." He said, a faded smile ghosting across his lips. "Stubborn too, but... " He lifted his eyes to stare into Ibrocs face. "It's going to take more than that, isn't it?"

Ibroc glanced away, unwilling to meet the Doctors eyes. It was all the answer the Doctor needed. Rose was by no means out of danger. It had been a long night. She had lost so much blood. If she was clinging to life, then it was by her fingertips, and she had every chance of falling. The Doctor leant heavily against the wall of the house, so that he didn't crumble to the ground a broken man.

"She survived the night." Ibroc said. "That in itself is miracle enough."

"No!" The Doctors eyes were ablaze with fire and venom as he looked at his friend. "It is not!" He looked away. "I'm sorry... I shouldn't..." He fell silent.

"Do you wish to see her?"

Suddenly the Doctor became alive again, his eyes sharp and keen. "Can I?"

The heavy curtain to Roses room was drawn back, and Ibroc and the Doctor walked through. The scent of many varied healing potions were thick in the air, and one corner of the room was filled with a rich selection of leaves, roots and bark, several of which the Doctor recognised. Burr root, Salifarr grass, Guppy seed, Dru bark, even a small amount of Elois berry, which would have been incredibly hard to get hold of. The Doctor smiled a little. They were all good solid choices.

Kyte was knealing on the floor next to Rose, a damp cloth in her hand as she carefully washed Roses face, gently patting around her small cuts and scratches. She looked up as they came to stand by the bed.

"She still sleeps." Kytes eyes shone with sorrow. She did not look at the Doctor, she could not bare to.

"All is well child." Ibroc offered her a gentle smile. "Thank you for all you have done. But leave us now. Go to the Tree Temples with the others, morning prayer is about to begin."

Silently Kyte gathered together her cloths and water bowl, then left the room with her head bowed.

The Doctor stirred slightly, something Ibroc had said. "Morning prayer." He said softly. "You should be there."

"It matters not."

"Yes it does. You're their Sage, and your place is with them." He looked at Rose. "I'll stay with her."

"Very well Doctor." Ibroc turned to leave, but before he did he looked back to his friend with one last instruction. "Talk to her. She needs to hear a voice in the darkness, so that she can find her way back."

The Doctor nodded wordlessly, then sat down at the side of the low bed. His eyes became intent upon Roses face. Her skin was pale except for her lips, which were flushed to the colour of strawberries. Her forehead now carried a delicate run of stitches just above her right eye, and her left cheek was scratched and bruised. But to the Doctor, she was the most beautiful thing his eyes had ever looked upon, and always would be. She was Rose. 

It terrified him to think that he had almost lost her forever, and that perhaps he still might. He closed his eyes for a second, blocking out the thought, refusing to even think that she may not yet wake from her dreams, and so condem him to live in nightmares. He opened his eyes and stared into her face. This was his fault. If he hadn't been a fool. If he hadn't treated her so badly. If he hadn't made her run out into the night. This was his fault.

He reached out gently and took hold of her hand, trying not to think about how cold her fingers were, how pale, how fragile. He steeled the breaking man within him. Reasoning that she needed him, more than he needed the luxury of grief.

"Rose." He wispered her name softly. "I know you're angry with me. But it's okay, I deserve it. I said things I shouldn't have. But Rose you have to come back. I need you." His body trembled with fear. "There's something I have to tell you. Should have done it before now really." He smiled at her and his voice grew hushed. "I love you Rose Tyler." He lifted her hand and brought her cold fingers up to his lips, kissing them softly. "So you come back to me eh? Do that for me. Because I love you."

Her head really hurt. That was the first thing Rose knew, even before she opened her eyes. She pushed out her hands sleepily, and unexpectedly felt her fingers run through grass and dry earth. She opened her eyes and blinked, trying to make the hazy mix of colours come into focus, eventually they did. There was a ladybird, all shiny and bright. It's post box red body climbing up a tall flower stem, in a jungle of long grass. Rose lay still and watched it intently, she counted the small perfectly black spots. Nine. Five on one wing, four on the other. The little insect continued it's mammoth climb further up the stem, it was a slow steady affair, and seemed a struggle. Just as Rose began to wonder why it didn't just fly away to wherever it was going to, a dark grey wolf spider swung down from above and swept up the surprised innocent. Its eight crooked legs wrapping around the tiny red body of the ladybird, as its jaws bit down, flooding poison into the screaming insect. Rose jolted backwards, away from the murder. It hadn't really screamed she told herself, and even if it had, she couldn't possibly have heard it.

She sat where she was, her heart racing. She could feel the rush of blood through her veins, and where her hands were still pressed firm against the ground, she almost thought she felt it spinning beneath her. She scrambled to her feet, her body shaking a little as she looked around. She was standing in the middle of a green grassy field, full of wild flowers. She saw red poppies, white daisies, and sunshine yellow dandylions. She looked above her and trembled as she saw the white clouds move across the bright blue sky, with the speed of race cars. It was as if the passage of time was moving faster above her, than it was where she stood. She looked back to the field of flowers, but they weren't there anymore, or perhaps she wasnt there anymore. Whatever the truth was, she was now standing in a childs playground.

Ahead of her was a set of swings, a blue metal frame work with rusty chains and worn wooden seats. A sudden breeze came up from no where, and the swings began to rock slightly. Her hair blew into her eyes, and she pushed it back irritably. There was someone sitting on one of the swings, a man. His head was bowed. Rose was sure he hadn't been there before. She began to walk toward him. This was something she knew, or had known. She stopped infront of the man on the swings, looking at him. He did not look up. Yet there was something so familiar about him. Rose looked at his blue grey striped suit, his purple shirt, worn shoes and reddish blond hair. She felt she was so close to remembering. It was there, but just out of reach.

Her head was hurting more than before, and she put her hand to her forehead, feeling a warm wetness trickle over her fingers. She brought her hand back down and looked at it as she held it out infront of her, seeing the red blood.

Another hand took hold of hers, it was bigger, rougher, but it held her hand gently, with tenderness. She looked up and stared into the face of the man, the stranger. Except he wasn't a stranger anymore. She knew him now. She smiled a wide bright smile, and saw it returned like a mirror image. 

"Hello sweetheart." His voice was just as she remembered it.

"Dad!" Tears filled her eyes and she fell into his arms and wrapped hers tightly around him, afraid to let go.

He rocked her gently and laughed. "Blimey Rose, you're gonna break my ribs if you keep this up."

She pulled back slightly, her cheeks damp with fallen tears. "What are you doing here?"

Pete Tyler gazed lovingly at his daughter, and pushed a stray blonde curl behind her ear. "No Rose." He corrected softly. "The question is, what are you doing here?"

Rose looked at him. "Dunno." She said at last. "I'm not sure where 'here' really is."

"Yes, well that's the thing isn't it? Could be anywhere... looks like Earth though, don't you think? Except for that." He pointed his finger to the sky. "Not exactly normal is it?"

Rose looked up. The sky was red now, like fire, she thougth she could almost see flames. She looked back to her Dad. "I don't understand."

"I wouldn't worry about it Princess." He slipped out of her hold and smiled at her again."It's only appearences - and they can be deceptive. Anyway, the where isn't important - it's more to do with the why."

"Why...why what?" Rose felt her headache was getting worse.

Pete Tyler sighed. "Why are you here Rose, with me, when you should be with him."

"Him?"

"The boyfriend."

"Mickey?"

"No love." Pete drew her close and kissed her cheek. "Look, I know I said I didn't approve and everything, but that was before. Things are different now. He's a good bloke. Besides he's waiting for you."

"Who?" Again, Rose felt that she had the answer within her, if only she could reach it. But it was buried too deep.

"I'm dead Rose. Remember? November 7th 1987." He smiled at her, love in his eyes. "But you're not, you're still... undecided."

"No!" She shook her head. "No!"

"I wanted to be a good Dad, Rose. I just never got the chance before. I never read you bedtime stories. Never took you on picnics in the country." He smiled softly. "But I can do this for you. I can show you that you have a choice. You shouldn't be here. It's not time."

"Dad." Tears welled in Roses eyes, reluctant memories surfacing.

He reached out and carefully took off a long chain that Rose wore around her neck. He held it infront of her face, as the silver key on the chain swung like a pendulum, catching the sunlight and flashing like fire.

Rose stared at it, and with the force of an ocean wave, memory surged through her, stinging every cell of her body. She felt a kiss press hard to her forehead, and she heard Pete Tylers voice one last time before everything went black.

"You go back to him Rose. Do it for me." 


	9. The Mind is a Wonderful Thing

THE MIND IS A WONDERFUL THING

Jackie Tyler was wearing a pink satin dressing gown, and pink fluffy slippers. Her hair was piled up loosely, because her roots needed doing, and it didn't look at its best when it was like that, so she'd found a pink clip in a draw. Probably one of Roses old ones... she was always finding them about the house. She had her make up on of course, just the bare minimum of lipstick, eyeshadow and mascara, oh and just a touch of powder. She'd dabbed a bit of perfume on too. The chemist on the High Street had been giving away tiny samples of a new posh one, so she'd grabbed a handful. Hussy, she thought it was called. Not a bad smell. That new postman was quite good looking, and you never know where a smile could lead, so it was best to look presentable, even at this time of the morning. Just in case. She walked over to the kitchen table and put a mug of tea down, splashing a bit, but not really noticing, not really... housework didn't start till after 'Trisha' anyway.

She looked at Rose. "You gonna drink that?"

Rose stared at the mug of tea. The mug was chipped, but her Mum wouldn't throw it away, cos it was a Charles and Diana Royal Wedding one. Sentimental value, she said. Rose just thought it was a chipped mug, like all the others. Any way it wasn't even 'her' mug. She used the one with the picture of the... she couldn't remember. Her head hurt.

"I said are you going to drink your tea?"

"Course." Rose reached out and took hold of the mug, dragging it across the table toward her.

"You're in a funny mood this morning." Jackie said as she dropped two slices of bread into the toaster.

"Am I?" Rose sipped the tea. It was too hot, too sweet, too milky. She drank it anyway. "Why?"

"Dunno." Jackie said, swiching on the radio, then turning it up a little. "Oh, I love this song..."

Rose put the mug back down onto the table top."I feel sort of... sick."

Jackie swung round and put her hand to Roses head. "Well, you don't have a temperature - that's good." She gave her a sudden look of concern. "But, I'll ring the Doctor if you want."

"The Doctor?" Rose looked up suddenly.

"Yeah, well you can't be too careful. Might be a bit tricky getting an appointment though - short notice. But Tina on reception owes me a favour, so she might be able to..."

"No." Rose said.

"You sure love?"

Rose put her hand to her head and felt a sticky warmth run between her fingers. She looked at her hand, seeing the blood. "I'm fine." She said.

"Well if you're sure." Jackie returned to the radio, turning it back down. "Huh... they must think we're stupid."

"Who?"

Jackie put the toast infront of Rose. "Eat up." She encouraged.

"Who thinks who's stupid?"

"It's a prank on the radio love." Jackie shook her head, taking a slice of toast. "Aliens... in Downing Street!"

"What?"

"Oh don't worry... it's probably students." Jackie gave a smile, then on hearing a noise got up, and adjusting her dressing gown, she set off toward the front door, hopefully. "Was that the post?"

Rose sat where she was, looking around the tiny kitchen. The tea in her mug was going cold, except it wasn't her mug, her mug had a picture of a... why couldn't she remember?

Jackie walked back into the kitchen, looking decidedly disappointed. "Wasn't the post, just 'His Majesty'." She said in a sarcastic tone, sitting back down.

"Hi babe." Mickey kissed Roses cheek swiftly and stole her toast, as she stared blankly into his face. "You don't want this do you?" He didn't wait for an answer, and bit into it.

"She's not feeling well." Jackie said.

"Rose?" He sounded concerned, even through a mouthful of toast. He put his hand to her forehead, and frowned. "You're burning up babe."

Jackie stood up. "She was fine a minute ago... a bit quiet maybe."

"Well she ain't now." Mickey took hold of Roses hand and pulled her up to stand next to him.

Rose looked at her hand in his and knew instinctively that something was wrong. Mickey was staring into her eyes with an intensity he didn't possess. Something was very wrong.

"She just needs another cup of tea." Jackie said, full of wisdom.

"Come here." Mickey said softly, and Rose did. "I think you need a Doctor."

Rose stared at Mickey as his words filled her head, until she was dizzy from hearing them. But the voice in her head was... different. Whatever was going on, she felt sure it was bad, very bad. She tore her hand free of Mickeys, and at once felt herself falling into the coming darkness.

Everything was upside down. Rose looked at it all and frowned. Why was it...wooooop - upright again. Better. Much. Especilly the view. She smiled into the face of the man who was holding her in his arms. Oh yes, the view was much improved. He was tall, dark and handsom, with a movie star twinkle in his smile. She was LOVING the view! He was dressed in a RAF uniform, and was considerably good looking, 'dashing' even - where had that word come from, she wondered. But then she was twisted, twirled and spun - in a good way. Oh. Back in his arms again. Then dipped low, but only for a second, then upright again. She caught his arm, her fingers clutching at his sleeve, and he stopped the dance. It was only then that she realised there was music playing. Nothing from her cd collection... but familiar all the same. She looked at him. He was smiling at her. She blushed. Then when she realised, she blushed some more. This was terrible! She didn't do blushing!

"What's wrong?" He asked softly.

American? Rose stared into his eyes. "I know you." She said, so close to remembering. So very close.

"Not as well as I'd like you to." He teased, pulling her in close, so that his lips hovered just above hers. "But...I guess I can't have everything." He reasoned, and swung her out and away from him again. Then she was back, close against him as his arms held her safe. She liked it in his arms.

"Tell me who you are." She lifted her head slightly. Oh his eyes were intense. Was it getting hot? Or was that just her?

"Don't you remember, Rose?" He pouted a little. "Well, I guess I can forgive you." He smiled at her, and the movie star twinkle gleamed.

"You're not really in the RAF are you?"

He laughed softly. "I wish!" He turned her around to the music. "I'm a 51st century intergalactic rogue. Will that do?"

"Not really."

"Didn't think so." He smiled at her warmly. Then with all seriousness he looked deep into her eyes. "I miss you Rose."

"Jack..." Rose said at once. A tear falling. Her heart breaking.

"So you 'do' remember me!" He was delighted.

"I thought... I thought you were dead!"

"As it turns out, the rumours of my death were greatly exaggerated." He turned her around again, swaying her slightly. "But enough about me..." He paused briefly, amazement lighting his eyes. "Did I really just say that?"

Rose grinned. Oh she had missed him so much. So very much. "Jack." She said softly.

He looked at her, gently touching her face. "That's a nasty bump you have there. It's bleeding you know. You'll get blood on your dress if you're not careful."

Rose took a half step away from him, looking at herself. She really was wearing a dress. She looked back up. "It's purple." Was all she could say.  
Jack shook his head. "Actually, it's mauve."

"The universal colour for danger." Rose said softly, surprising herself. Where had that come from? The same place as 'dashing' ?

"Oh, you 'have' been paying attention!" Jack looked impressed. "I think you're almost ready."

"For what?"

"Your new dance partner." Jack said, kissing her cheek then letting her go. "He's waiting for you."

"Who?" Rose asked. But Jack was walking away, and it was getting dark again. She tried to run after him, but the darkness took him, and then she was alone, and cold.

Feeling her head throb softly, she unwillingly touched her forehead. But this time she did not feel the sticky warmth of her own blood. She looked at her fingers as she held her hand infront of her, there was no blood. She looked down at her dress, but she was now wearing a rose pink top and jeans. Her favourite jeans. How did she know that? She slipped her hand into her pocket and pulled out a mobile, just as it began to ring. She stared at the small screen, reading the words that were on display.

She spoke them into the darkness, although it was little more than a whisper. "Tardis calling." The phone stopped ringing. For a second the silence was deafening. Then the noise came.

Rose closed her eyes, letting it wash over her. She tried to drown in every note of it's beautiful pitch. It filled her head, her heart, her blood her soul. She opened her eyes, her lashes wet with tears, and looked at the large blue box that was now infront of her. She knew it's name. Shaking, she walked forward through the darkness, her step silent. She put her hand on the aged wooden door and pushed it slightly open. She hesitated, only for a second, then walked inside.

The bright lights of the TARDIS, hurt her eyes a little, at first, until the TARDIS realised, and slightly dimmed them for her. Rose smiled at the old ships kindness. She walked slowly around the console, her fingers trailing a lazy path over levers and buttons and cogs and wheels. Each one widening her smile, until she thought she might burst with happiness. She was home. At last. HOME.

Her hand knocked something off the side of the console, and it slipped to the floor next to her foot. Rose looked at it, then bent down and picked it up. She held it in her hands. It was a wallet of sorts, small and black and made of leather. She opened it. Her smile drifted slightly. Printed quite clearly in bold black letters across the pale ivory paper, were two words. WAKE UP.

Rose looked at them. Wake up - was that it? Was that all she had to do? She could do that. Probably.

The Doctor stood with the suns warm kiss on his face, and wondered how many times he would have to endure its rise and fall alone. This was the third morning since Roses accident, that he had spent watching daylight gradually creep through the less than vigilant night, until it won the sky for another day. He would watch as life stirred, uncurled, and woke. All life. Except the one that mattered. She slept on. Bound in her dreams.

That first morning, the Doctor had returned to the TARDIS. A short while later the old blue box had appeared in the village, next to Ibrocs house. Not long afterwards the Doctor had staggered out through the doors, laden down with books from the TARDIS library, and a handful of magazines he'd found in Roses room. Since then he had spent each day at Roses side, reading to her. Charles Dickens mostly, but sometimes it was 'Cosmopolitan', or 'Marie Claire'. He'd found the glossies to be surprisingly educational. There had been a particularly interesting artical about the curse of cellulite. He'd discovered the best way to apply eyeshadow, the hottest colours of lipstick for the coming months, and learnt that most women were obsessed with bags and shoes. Although he didn't understand why. It hadn't been explained. Plus, there had been a free mascara on the cover of one of the magazines - Rose would be delighted. When she woke up. He knew it didn't matter what he read really. He just wanted her to know he was waiting for her.

Soon, he would go back inside the house and start all over again. He thought that he'd finish 'A Christmas Carol', today. He knew that it wouldn't be long before the prayer bell would ring out, and he didn't want to still be standing outside when that happened. He'd seen enough looks of pity, and it did him no good to see more. He heard a noise, behind him. Surely the villagers weren't up and about already?

He turned to look, a frown appearing, then deepening. Rose stood in the doorway of Ibrocs house. She looked pale, fragile. The Doctor didn't really know how he closed the distance from where he stood, to the doorway, but he did it. Getting there just in time to catch Rose, as she fainted into his arms. 


	10. Goodbye My Friend

GOODBYE MY FRIEND

With infinite care, the Doctor carried Rose inside the TARDIS, back to her room, and lay her gently down onto her bed, where her body sank into the familair softness. More than anything, he wanted to sweep her up into his arms and hold her tightly to him. To have the scent of her possess his mind, so that he could know the wonder of her again, like a forgotten childhood story. But he couldn't do that. It wasn't safe, she was still so... delicate. He would only hurt her, and he'd never forgive himself if he did that - again. So instead he brushed her hair away from her face a little, yet even in that smallest touch he was unable to prevent his fingers from stealing the softest caress from her cheek. She didn't feel cold anymore.

She moaned slightly, and he trembled, remembering the very last time he'd heard her make that sound. Fear tightened like a knot within him, but he swallowed it back down.

Her eyes opened, and she stared at him. How long had it been since she had done that? He tried to remember, but couldn't, he was so dazed by the perfect curiosity within their depths. He grinned at her. He couldn't contain his joy. Like a tidal wave it washed away his fear and pain. Rose was looking at him. Eyes wide and bright. His hearts beat hard in his chest, and his love for her swept through him, unchecked. These past few days he had lived in the darkest despair, but now he was soaring into a bright sky.

"Oh Rose..."

He reached out to touch her face, but she flinched, even before the touch came. At once understanding that it was too soon, the Doctor let his hand fall back, to lie still on the soft bed. He looked away for a second. How could he have been stupid enough to think that he could just... make things right with a touch. He should have known better. What he had done to her. What he had said. It would take time for her to forgive him. He realised at that moment, that her forgivness was not something he could entirely be sure of. She may never look at him with those soft sweet eyes again. But of course that had been what he had wanted - then. So really he had no one to blame but himself. At least she was alive, and that warmed his hearts enough. To ask for more, so soon, was selfish. He would wait. He would treat her with patience and gentleness. Whatever it took, to win back her heart, he would do. And this time he would keep it safe.

His gaze returned to Rose. She had pulled herself up a little, so that she was now almost sitting. She watched him with dark, intense, smoke brown eyes. And the Doctor adored her. He smiled softly. But then he saw that she was holding her hand pressed at her wounded side, and fear swept through him like an old friend. All his fine plans about how careful he would be were forgotten, and he took hold of Roses hand, pulling it away even though she tried not to let him. He slipped a hand under her top, carefully moving the clothing up slightly. His sharp eyes saw the fresh stain of blood creeping through the bandage.

"Damn." He carefully removed the covering, as Rose winced with the pain she was trying to ignore. Her concentration fixed on him as he stood up quickly and took charge. "Stay there and don't move!" Was his firm instruction. "I mean it Rose."

She knew that he did, and nodded silently. She glanced at the wound, and for a second could not look away. It was bruised and raw, still new and sharp. She watched the blood trickle slowly from the break in the line of neat stitches that so precariously held her flesh together. But soon enough her head moved back into the softness of a pillow. She closed her eyes for a moment, the pain washing through her. Then, hearing the Doctor return to the room, and her side, she opened her eyes again. He did not look at her, but she watched him intently. Like a cat watches a mouse.

He sat next to her on the bed and with a small bowl of water and a soft cloth he washed her clean of blood, then he examined the broken line of stitches. His eyes lifted to hers."I think they'll hold. You're lucky."

He turned his attention to fixing a new covering to her wound. When it was done, he looked back to her face. "It could have been much worse. What were you thinking? You're lucky they didn't all rip open when you..." He stopped suddenly."I'm sorry." He said. "It's not you're fault. It's mine. I should have been with you. It wouldn't have happened if I'd sat with you longer." He hung his head.

Rose stared at him in silence, seeing his sadness, and feeling it touch her heart. She ran her fingers over the clean fresh covering of her wound. She chewed at her lower lip, and considered the man who sat at her side, so worn and tired. She took a small breath to speak, and on hearing it, the Doctor lifted his head.

"Rose?"

She gathered all her bravery, and found her voice. But she could not have known the look of loss that was to settle upon the Doctors face when she at last spoke. If she had, perhaps she would have chosen to remain silent.

"Who are you?"

It only took a few days before a change became apparent in Rose. Her health improved quicker than the Doctor could ever have hoped for. The medicines Ibroc regularly made for her seemed to have a miraculous effect. Even Rose, who would scowl at the cups of bitter tasting brews, understood that they were healing her, and she drank them without complaint. Well perhaps a little complaint, sometimes. But on the whole she was an excellent patient. Or so the Doctor was told. He thought it better that he did not spend his time with Rose. Telling her that she needed to rest, to heal, and his presence would only get in the way. He thought that she belived him. But of course it was a lie. The Doctor had quickly come to realise that he had to put a distance between himself and Rose, because to be near her, to look at her, and know that she did not know him, was sometimes more than he could bare. So he retreated to the TARDIS. To a place where he had known her, and loved her. A place where she had almost made him complete.

The Doctor had of course explained as much as he could to Rose. He did not tell her why she had run into the darkness that night, only that he had found her after her fall. That the knife, the knife she had carried with her, Owlers knife, had been pushed into her, somehow. Most likely as she had landed on the hard stoney ground. He had told her about what he was, about the Time War, about the loss of his world. That they were... friends. She had accepted it all with the same ease she had done the first time he had told her his story. She remembered her life before him as clearly as if she was still living it. But that was all. She did not know him, except as the man who had caught her in his arms when she had fallen.  
The Doctor however could remember a time, not so very long ago, when he had held her hand in his, and promised her he would never let her fall. But Rose, did not.

Rose sat on the steps of Ibrocs house, her elbows on her knees and her chin in her hands, as she watched the Doctor. For the past few minutes he had been repeatedly walking back and forth, from the house to the TARDIS. He would leave the house with arm fulls of books, go into the TARDIS, be gone for a few minutes, then reappear, to walk back into Ibrocs house, bringing out yet more books. Rose thought that he must have repeated the journey at least five times so far, and each time he had passed her on the step, he hadn't once looked at her. She waited till he had come out of the TARDIS doors one more time, heading toward her, his head bowed. He had almost reached her when she spoke.

"What are you doing?"

He stopped in his tracks, lifting his head and looking at her. "Putting the books back in the TARDIS library." He said, as though it was obvious.

"Why?"

"Time to go." He said simply. He passed her on the step again, disappearing into the house. Which at least gave Rose time to think.

"Go where?" She asked, standing up and facing him, when he reappeared again.

"Anywhere." The Doctor said simply, as a thick glossy magazine slipped off the top of the current pile of books in his arms.

Rose bent down and picked it up, tearing off the free mascara from the cover and pushing it into the back pocket of her jeans, then dropping the magazine back on top of the books in the Doctors arms. "I love the freebies." She smiled at him. "What if I don't wan't to go?"

The Doctor stood and stared at her. It took him a second to remember to breathe. "You don't have a choice." He said firmly, and disappeared back into the TARDIS.

Her mouth slightly open, Rose gazed after the Doctor. It took a minute or so for what he had just said to sink in. Then she followed him inside the TARDIS.

She bumped straight into the Doctor as she charged into the control room, her hands spreading out against his leather jacket for a second, as his hands rested at her hips. She looked up into his eyes, and for a second she forgot to breathe. Their bodies parted far too quickly, and Rose wondered why it was her heart was racing. She looked at the Doctor from under her lashes, and she felt a thrill of satisfaction to see that he appeared... shaken. An unbidden smile flickered to life at her lips.

"Do you remember the way to your room?" He asked suddenly.

She looked up. "Not really..."

"Oh well, no hurry. I'll show you later." He made to pass her, to walk back out through the doors. But she stood her ground.  
"What do you mean...I don't have a choice?"

He looked, restless, unwilling even. "Just what it says on the tin." He said at last. "You came, you saw, you fell off a cliff - time to go."

"I like it here. I don't want to go."

The Doctor froze. The words cutting him, chilling him to the bone. He stared into her eyes, searching them. "If you stay here... you'll die." He said at last. "Sooner rather than later, and there's no way of stopping it."

Rose shook her head."What are you talking about?"

"There's a lot you don't know about this planet. Things you should know before deciding to settle down to a life of bliss with pointy stick boy." He couldn't help the tone of jealousy that slipped into his voice.

Rose sighed. "What is it with you and Owler? You're always... glaring at eachother."

"I doesn't matter - we're going." He tried again to walk past her, but Rose grabbed his arm.

"I does matter. I want to know."

The Doctor looked at her. She had the right to know, he thought, the right to choose. However much he wanted to, he could not take that from her. He nodded bleakly, and Rose waited.

"If you stay on Harku... then you'll die. No-one lives to a ripe old age here. Especilly off worlders."

"What are you talking about? Ibrocs at least..."

"Twelve." The Doctor finished for her. "Not a bad age for a Harkun. They don't tend to live past fourteen. But it's a good life. Owlers four, if you're interested. The same age as Ibroc was when I first met him. That would have been about the time we started to plant the Tree Temples"  
Dazed, Rose stared at the Doctor. She shook her head in disbelief. "No. Those trees have to be at least..."

"A little over eight years old." The Doctor said. "This is a beautiful world Rose, a paradise. But the life cycle of this world is unique to its people. That's why it's remained a paradise while other worlds are spoilt and over populated, polluted to the point of almost self extinction. No other race could settle on Harku Rose, because eventually, after eating it's food, drinking it's water, breathing it's air - they would become like the Harkuns. They would age before their time, and die within a few years."

"But... but we've been here..."

"Long enough... but not enough to make any change."

Rose's eyes gleamed with tears. "Owlers mother..." She wispered softly.

The Doctor nodded. "She was an off worlder. She fell in love with Ibroc and chose to remain on Harku. She died before her time"  
A tear fell to Roses cheek. "Can't you... isn't there something you can do?"

"It's in blood and bone Rose. It's who and what they are. I can't change it, anymore than I could change the lifespan of a... butterfly."

"They're all going to die" Rose said in quiet acceptance.

"Everything dies Rose... but their children will grow, and their children and their children."

Rose nodded. "I understand."

"So you'll come with me." The Doctor let out a sigh of relief. Then he fixed Rose with a slow warm smile. "You've not seen the Urgah system yet, have you... maybe we could go there next. They have casinos there that put Vegas to shame - you'll love it."

"I'm sorry Doctor, I can't." Rose looked into his face and knew that whatever she said, however she tried to dress it up, he would see straight through it, so she steeled herself, and decided to tell him the truth. However much it might hurt him. "I don't know you. I can't remember you. I believe everything you've told me. That I travel with you, that we had all those... adventures. And it's not that I don't trust you, cos I do. I know we were friends."

Friends? The Doctor closed his eyes for a second. Why did that word hurt so much? "What is it Rose?"

"I don't remember any of it." She said at last. "If I can't stay here, then..." She smiled a soft sweet smile that killed the Doctor a hundred times over. "I want to go home. To Earth."

The Powell Estate was unusually quiet. Only a barking dog, and the occasional passing car disturbed the restful darkness. It was close to midnight and the air was cool. The moon was hidden behind heavy grey clouds, so the only light there was came from the street lamps - the ones that were still working. No-one noticed the arrival of the strange blue box, that appeared out of no-where. No-one but the barking dog heard the song of its wirring, grinding, heart beat.

Rose had forgotten her key. So they rang the bell of flat 48 Bucknall House, and waited. The lights came on inside the flat, one after the other, until finally they heard the door being unlocked. It opened a crack, no more, a chain stopping it. Then Jackie Tylers eyes peered out.

"Oh my God, Rose!" The door closed, its chain ripped away, then it swung open wide, as Jackie wrapped Rose into her arms and began sqeezing the life out of her. Suddenly she pushed her daughter to arms length and stared into her eyes. "What's wrong? Are we being attacked by aliens again? Please say were not, cos I've only just got the last bit of Slitheen stain off the kitchen ceiling!"

Rose bit her lip. Her smile wide. "No aliens Mum. Promise."

Jackie looked the Doctor up and down, disaprovingly. "Except him." She said, tugging at Roses hand. "Come in then." She frowned slightly. "What happend to your head?"

Rose touched her forehead, her fingers brushing over the run of stitches. She smiled slowly. "Nothing."

The Doctor didn't follow Rose, he couldn't. She was home now, and he didn't belong. "Jackie." He said suddenly. Jackie and Rose turned around to look at him. He swallowed hard. "I've brought Rose home."

Jackie looked at him for a long time, then she did something that she had never done before, and the Doctor hoped she would never do again. She kissed him.

Rose stared into the Doctors eyes, as she leant against the door. She smiled. "You sure you won't come in?"

"Positive." The Doctor nodded. "Far too dangerous."

Rose grinned. "She wont kiss you again... really she won't."

The Doctor smiled slightly. "What are you going to tell her?"

"Not much... she'll only worry."

A silence fell between them, but eventually the Doctor found the words to break it. "I have to go Rose." He looked at her face. "It's time."

"Will I see you again?" She asked, hopefully.

He shook his head. "No."

"Never?"

"No."

"Not even for.."

"No."

She looked away for a second, then looked back, her eyes shining with tears. She stepped towards him, her hands gently moving to rest at his shoulders, as she leant in slowly to kiss him. But before she could, the Doctor pulled away, his hands pushing her back from him. Rose stepped back, surprised and confused. He stood looking at her for as long as he could, then smiled from both his hearts, offering Rose his hand. She took it cautiously, and gazed into his eyes, seeing in that one moment all the wonders of the universe that he had ever gazed upon.

"Goodbye Rose Tyler." He said softly. "Have a fantastic life." 


	11. Deja vu ain't what it used to be

DEJA VU AIN'T WHAT IT USED TO BE

Even though she was waking up in her own bed, in her own room, and everything looked exactly as she'd left it, Rose knew that something was different. She could feel it, almost in the same way that the air changes before an oncoming storm. It un-nerved her. She wanted to put it down to her lack of sleep, as all night she had been disturbed by dark dreams of the Doctor. She had no idea if they were flights of fancy, or real memories trying to struggle to the surface. But the feelings they had left her with... troubled her. Pushing them to the back of her mind, she got dressed and went through to the kitchen, where she could smell toast burning.

"Morning sweetheart!" Jackie was wearing a pink satin dressing gown and pink fluffy slippers. "I've made breakfast." She put a mug of tea onto the table, and Rose sat down. She almost reached across for the tea, but something made her stop. She looked at the mug. It was a Charles and Diana royal wedding one, slightly chipped.

"That's not my mug. My mug has a rose on it."

Jackie turned and frowned at Rose. "Oh." She said at last. "I broke it, sorry. The handle came off. Anyway that's a nice mug... it has sentimental value."

Rose said nothing, and dragged the chipped sentimental mug toward her. She sipped the tea, and for some reason wasn't in the least bit surprised to find it was too hot, too sweet, and too milky. But she drank it anyway.

Jackie put a plate of well done toast down infront of her. "Eat up." She encouraged.

Rose almost choked on her tea. She put the mug back down. "Not hungry."

Jackie looked disapointed. "But Rose..." That was as far as she got, as there was a sudden noise at the front door.

Rose jumped. "Don't answer it!"

Jackie looked at her as if she was mad. She shook her head, and went to answer the door, a minute later she was back. She sat opposite Rose and dropped a pile of letters onto the table.

"It was just the post." She said with an air of disapointment.

Rose didn't want to ask, she really, really, didn't want to ask. But she had to. "Was.. was he... goodlooking... the postman?"

Jackie frowned. "You don't half ask some odd questions since you took up with that Doctor."

"Was he?" Rose asked, more determined than before. Somehow it mattered.

Jackie stood up, and walked over to the sink. "No love... 'he' wasn't good looking. Cos, her name is Sally... and she's a woman." She turned to look at Rose. "Is there anything you want to know about the milkman while we're at it?"

Rose sighed, feeling a sense of relief, that she couldn't really understand. She smiled. "No, it's...ok."

Jackie was at Roses side again. She brushed back her hair, and peered at the healing wound on her daughters forehead. "I s'pose you got that on some alien planet then?"

Rose nodded.

Jackie scowled. "You should get a Doctor to have a look at it. Might be infected with some kind of alien super bug."

"Mum.." Rose rolled her eyes.

"Tina on reception owes me a favour, maybe she can..."

Rose stood up, her chair screetching backwards."No!" She said, making for the front door."I'm going out."

"Rose!" Jackie called after her, but it was no good, Rose was already out of the door, and running.

Jackie sighed as she watched the door slam shut. She shook her head slightly, oh the neighbours would love that at this time of the morning! Her foot knocked something on the floor under the table, and she looked down. It was Roses bag, the one she'd had with her last night, when she'd come home. She smiled as she looked at it. In flight luggage she thought, and her smile grew wider. She picked the bag up and headed into Roses room with it.

Rose was out of breath when she eventually stopped running. She didn't know if she'd been running away from something - or to something. Either way, she stopped when she got to the tarmac court, where the local kids played football, rode bikes, and scrawled their names on walls, and... she looked down and saw it. She swallowed hard, and knew. She had been running to something. To this. BAD WOLF. She felt the connection to the half scrubbed away words of graffiti, but couldn't explain it. She couldn't really remember what it meant, but she was certain that it did mean... something. Something important.

She groaned out loud with frustration. Her head was spinning. All she had were questions. But what she wanted was answers. She had come home, because that was what she knew. Or thought she knew. This place, Earth, was home. But at the same time it was different... no... she was the one that was different. She was the one who had changed. Even if she couldn't remember how or why, she knew that she had. She looked up at the sky, and stared into the grey clouds that were gathering. She had travelled and come home. The Doctor had brought her home, because she had asked him to. She should be happy. So why wasn't she?

She pulled the zipper up on her jacket, the air was colder now, the daylight turning to grey around her. She set off walking, only half aware that a storm was coming, only half caring. Around the corner and across the road, she caught a bus. She smiled to herself as she sat down and looked at the other passengers... if only they knew what was out there. Her smile drifted, and she turned her face to stare out of the window, and the grey clouds darkened, and the rain began to fall.

Jackie dropped the bag onto Roses bed and unzipped it. Her hand slipped inside, expecting to pull out a bundle of unwashed clothes ready for the machine. But instead her fingers closed over a book. She pulled it out of the bag and looked at it in surprise. It was quite attractive looking. Medium sized, with a strokeably soft crimson suede cover, and a narrow black ribbon which trailed out from between the ivory pages. Jackie knew at once what it was. She wished that she hadn't opened the bag, wished that she hadn't found the book. But she 'had' opened the bag, she 'had' found the book. That was the trouble. Her fingers brushed over the books cover and Jackie trembled a little, hating herself for what she was about to do. But she had to do it. No choice. She drew in a breath to steady her nerve, then carefully opened the books cover. Her eyes fell to the words written in black ink across the first page. 'The Diary of Rose Tyler'. She let out a small sigh, then sat down on Roses bed and turned the page carefully. She looked at the date - if it was a date, that Rose had written in the top right hand corner of the page. Platform One, 5.5/Apple/26. An involuntary breath escaped Jackies lips. Then she began to read.

Rose sat on a wall across the street from Henricks. Just looking. She didn't remember the details of what had happened at the shop... it was all very sketchy in her head. But by the looks of things, she had been lucky to get out alive. Whatever had happened.

The building was all blown out windows, and scaffold now, most of the shop front was covered with a large plastic banner, announcing that the store was closed for refurbishment (no kidding), and would be re-opening soon. She wondered if she'd get her job back. Then she wondered if she wanted her job back. She couldn't answer either question.

Her stomach rumbled, she was hungry, at least she knew that. She got up and started walking, there had to be a chip shop around somewhere. She stopped suddenly, a cold memory touching her. Get up, catch the bus, go to work, come back home, eat chips and go to bed. Was that it? Was that what she had come home for? Was that her future?

She wiped away a tear. She hadn't even realised that she had been crying. She pushed her hands deep into her pockets and carried on walking.

Jackie closed Roses diary, and set the book on her lap. She looked at it, and stroked it's red suede cover almost as if it was a cat, curled up and fast asleep. Then she lifted her hand to her mouth, to prevent a sob, and she fought back tears. She stood up quickly, turning her attention back to the bag. She looked at it, then stuffed the diary back inside, pulling the zip closed again. Once that was done she sighed with relief, and dropped the bag onto the floor, kicking it under the bed slightly. Her eyes skimmed the room, pictures, posters, soft toys, stray socks... Rose was everywhere. But Jackie understood now that her little girl was gone, she'd grown up. She'd seen so much, and lost so much more. Jackie walked to the doorway then glanced back, giving the bag under the bed one last lingering look. Rose would never know she'd read her diary... and she would never tell her otherwise. She walked out of the room, closing the door behind her.

The next day came and went, then the next, then the next. Soon it was a week since Rose had come home. She slipped back into routine, making no rebellion against it. She would spend her time with Shireen and Mickey, and at night she would curl up infront of the tv. Everything was... normal. But sometimes Jackie would see the loss in Roses eyes, and she would have to look away, bite her tongue, and convince herself that she hadn't seen anything at all.

She was doing just that now, over another breakfast. As Rose absentmindedly stirred a spoon through her half eaten bowl of cereal. Jackie sat down across from her, and Rose looked up, her eyes sharp again.

"You're still not sleeping right are you?" Jackie asked.

Rose shrugged her shoulders. "I'm fine."

"I heard you walking around last night..."

"Sorry."

Jackie hesitated. "You dream about him don't you? That's why you don't want to go to sleep. The nightmares."

Rose looked up. There was no point in lying. "They're not nightmares." She said quietly. "I think they might be memories."

"What kind of memories?" Jackie wanted to know.

"Dunno. It's all... hazy. Just flashbacks. Faces, voices." She looked at her Mum. "Feelings."

"Oh Rose." It was all she could say.

Rose straightened in her chair."It's okay." She lied brightly. "I'm okay. I promise I'll get some sleep tonight. How's that?"

Jackie cheered up slightly. "Promise?"

"Promise." Rose repeated.

Jackie smiled, feeling much better. "You know... a job would do you no end of good."

Rose frowned, knowing that this was leading somewhere. "Oh yeah?"

"There's a new clothes shop opening up on Ferndene Road. You could always give them a go." Jackie suggested. "You've done shop work... you'd like it."

Rose shook her head."No... can't"

"Why not?" Jackie wanted to know.

"I just can't." But Rose saw that her Mum wasn't satisfied, and gave in. "I walked past that place yesterday. They had a window full of shop dummies... freaked me out. I had to go to McDonalds for a coffee." She sighed. "It was well weird."

Jackie looked at Rose. "Oh." She sipped her tea, and didn't mention it again.

Reluctantly Rose had agreed to go to a club with Mickey. He and her Mum had ganged up on her. She'd had no choice. They wanted her to be the person she had been. How could she tell them that the Rose they knew didn't exist anymore? She couldn't. So she had gone. She'd dressed up in something pretty, just as her Mum had begged her to, and she'd danced with Mickey just as he'd wanted her to. She'd even talked in the loos with Shireen, just cos that's what the old Rose would have done. But by midnight, she had known without a shadow of a doubt, that she wasn't the old Rose. Not anymore. She hadn't been for a long time.

Shireen had stayed on at the club, she'd bumped into an old boyfriend, and was more than happy for Rose and Mickey to catch a taxi back to the Powell Estate without her. She told Rose that with any luck, she'd be heading in the direction of the other side of town anyway - if Karl played his cards right.

Mickey held her hand as they walked toward the flats. He asked hopefully if she wanted to go back to his, rather than home to Jackie. He was sweet, and offered coffee, and promised to order pizza - her choice. But Rose knew that he wanted her to stay with him, to spend the night, and she couldn't do that. How could she sleep with Mickey, when another man walked through her dreams? It just wasn't right to do that. Mickey deserved better than she could give him. She knew it, and if he was honest... so did he.

So, gentleman that he was, Mickey walked her to her front door, and kissed her cheek. He looked at her with soft puppy dog eyes, then turned and walked away. Rose pushed her key into the lock and walked inside, closing and locking the door behind her. She let her eyes grow accustomed to the darkness inside the flat, not wanting to switch on any lights that might wake her Mum. Besides, somehow life, existance, was less real in the dark. She kicked off her pretty pink sequin strewn shoes, leaving them by the front door, and walked barefoot across the carpet to her room.

Once inside she closed the door and walked through the dark to her bed, thinking that she would just lie down and rest a little. For a while. Dreams were unwanted tonight. She hurt too much. Her foot brushed against something under the bed and she bent down to pull it out, lifting it, she dropped it on the bed and switched on the small bedside lamp. It was just her bag. For a second she stared at it, then she sat down on the bed and unzipped it, putting her hand inside. The first thing she touched was smooth and cold, almost too cold. Her fingers curled around it and she withdrew it from the bag, holding it in her hand. Slowly she opened her fingers, and looked at what she held in her palm. It was no more than a key on a chain. A bright, shiny, cold, silver key. She looked at it, and then the Earth fell away like a landslide, and she let out a ragged, desperate breath, as violently, brutally, her memory crashed back into her with breathtaking force. She dropped the key, and it slid to the floor, where she watched it flash like starlight, as her tears began to fall, and she too slid to the floor, burying her face in her hands as she sobbed uncontrollably. She knew everything now. Everything she had known, and everthing she had lost. It was unbearable. 


	12. Flesh and Blood

FLESH AND BLOOD

Jackie found Rose in the morning, barefoot and still in the pink dress she'd worn the night before. She was slumped on the floor next to her bed, her head fallen forward, her blonde hair covering her face. For one awful moment Jackie thought she was dead. That she had lost her forever. She must have cried out, because something stirred Rose into waking, and she lifted her head with a groan, as the pain in her neck jarred through her. It was only then that Jackie saw Roses face, her cheeks stained with streaks of black mascara, from long hours of tears.

"Rose!" Jackie dropped to the floor next to her daughter, and swept her tight into her arms. She rocked her gently, and Rose held on to her for dear life.

"I remember, Mum." She said in misery. "All of it."

"I know sweetheart." Jackie comforted softly. "I know... it's going to be alright." She pressed a firm kiss to her forehead. "I promise."

Rose sat at the kitchen table, feeling numb. A hot mug of tea had been put infront of her. The great British cure all. If that didn't work, nothing would, Jackie had said, then at once regretted it. The look on Roses face didn't flicker, and Jackie thought that she might not have heard her anyway.

"Rose." She said softly, pushing the mug a little closer. "Drink up, it's hot and sweet. Just what you need for shock."

Rose looked up, staring into Jackies concerned eyes. "I'm not in shock. I'm..." She looked at her hands, clenched tight in her lap and let the sentence remain unfinished.

"Do you want me to call Mickey?"

Rose looked at her again, frowning. "What for?"

For a second Jackie was stumped. "I... I dunno love. I just thought that you might..." She sighed. The room was filling with unfinished sentences.

Jackie had never found words so difficult to come by in all her life. She hated seeing Rose like this. She felt so... helpless. Like there was nothing she could do to make things right. Mothers were 'supposed' to be able to make things right... even without a magic wand. When Rose had been a child, and fell and grazed her knee, as all children do, Jackie would stick a plaster on it and kiss it better. She'd take her to the park, and let her feed the ducks, and soon enough the pain would go away, forgotten. She wished that it could be that easy again. She wished that there was something - anything, she could do to make it better. Then she realised - there was.

She took hold of Rose's hand and tugged."Come on, enough moping. It won't do you any good sitting there." She pulled at her hand again, glad that this time Rose stood up, moving with her as they walked through the flat.

"Mum..."

"You're having a bath, a nice long one with lots of bubbles." Jackie told her as they stopped outside the bathroom door.

"I just wanna..."

Jackie swung around to face her daughter with an expression of determination that took Roses breath away. "I said you're having a bath Rose - with bubbles!"

Wide eyed, Rose stared at her, and nodded. "Okay."

Jackie pushed her into the bathroom and closed the door. "Use that posh shampoo... the one that smells like the Amazon rainforest." Was her last instruction, before she retreated from the door, waiting, listening. She heard the noise of running water, and with it made her escape, into Roses room.

She shut the door. Better that way she thought, just in case. Then she turned to face the room. The silver key and chain was still lying on the floor by the bed. Jackie walked across and picked it up. She held it in her hand, turning it so that it caught the sunlight, and flashed brightly, she threw it back into the open bag. She looked at the bag for a second, before her hands opened it up wide, and rummaged through it's contents. It had to be there, she told herself, it just had to. She'd almost given up, when she found it, slipped inside it's own special pocket within the bag... of course. Her fingers closed over it, and she held it in her hand. It didn't look much, a bit cheap, a bit ordinary, but according to Roses diary... it was a 'Superphone'.

Rose walked to the livingroom, she was wearing trainers, jeans and a grey t-shirt. She'd left her hair loose, and put on just enough make up to convince her Mum that she was over the worst. She'd figured it out while she'd been soaking in a bath full of bubbles... it was no good pretending that she'd wake up and find out that this was all a bad dream. It wasn't. This was real. It was her life now. Whatever she had been part of before - that was the dream. And dreams were just... dreams.

For a second she stood in the doorway, just looking at her Mum. Jackie was staring out of the window, she hadn't even noticed Rose was there. Rose gave a small sigh. Life moves on, she thought. Jackie was probably watching the neighbours. The Powell Estate was better than the tv sometimes. Taking a breath, she walked into the room.

"What ya looking at?" She asked, not really caring. "Is it Samantha Jones again... has Trevor come back?"

Jackie tore herself away from the window and spun to face her daughter. Rose thought she looked like a little girl who had been caught stealing a sweet, that she had already been told she couldn't have. She looked... guilty. Rose frowned.

"What?" Jackie flustered, and glanced briefly back to the window. "No... it's nothing. I just wondered if... if it was raining."

Roses frown deepened. The sky was bright blue with barely a cloud in it. The sunlight was strong and warm. She looked back to Jackie.

"You thought it was raining?"

Jackie shrugged. "You know what the Summers like love, you can never tell."

Rose gave up. She picked up her denim jacket from the back of the sofa and pulled it on. "I'm off out then." She turned.

"No!"

She turned back. "What?"

"You can't go out... it might rain." Jackie said, then looked away, wishing she was better at this whole 'thinking on her feet' thing. Rose frowned deeper still. "What's the matter with you... what's going on?"

There was a knock at the door, and both mother and daughter looked at eachother, neither giving anything away.

Jackie held her breath as Rose went to open the door. She waited. The next second Rose was back in the livingroom. She was angry.

"You rang him!" She accused. "What did you ring him for?"

Jackie stood, her mouth opening and closing like a goldfish as she tried to find the words to explain. Then she frowned, looking over Roses shoulder. Mickey was standing behind her, looking all t-shirt, trainers, and Jobseekers.

"Um..." It was the best Jackie could manage, and in the circumstances she thought it was pretty damn good.

Rose swung round to face Mickey. "I thought you understood... last night. I can't... " She shook, not wanting to hurt him. "You and me we're..."

"Over." Mickey said softly. He offered her a smile. "But you can't blame a bloke for trying."

"You know why I cant be with you." Rose said.

Mickey nodded. "But he's a million light years away Rose... and I'm not. I'm here. I always have been."

Rose hesitated for a moment, then slowly walked toward Mickey, letting him take her into his arms, letting him hold her tight. She rested her head against his shoudler and closed her eyes. She tried to push away the thoughts that crept into the dark, the face of the man she saw there, the feelings that were raw and wanting. She tried to leave them in the dark, where they belonged. But she couldn't... even now in a flat on the Powell Estate, in her Mums livingroom, in Mickeys arms... she could hear the roar of the TARDIS engines. The beat and throb and scream that she loved...

She opened her eyes, and pulled out of Mickeys arms. She staggered back. She could hear it! She could really hear it! She looked at her Mum, and saw that she was smiling.

"Mum?" A tear fell to her cheek. The sound of the TARDIS filling the air.

Jackie picked up Roses bag from behind the sofa, and threw it at her. Rose caught it, holding it close and tight. Still afraid to belive that what she was hearing was real. She turned to look at Mickey, and knew that it was.

His eyes were wild with disbelief as he stared at Rose. "You said he wasn't coming back."

Rose came to life. She ran past Mickey, out of the flat, following the sound that rang in her head and heart. She didn't know that her Mum and Mickey were chasing after her. She didn't care.

She stopped about six foot from it. An old, blue, wooden box, hidden in plain sight against a brick wall, next to a row of garages. The TARDIS. She heard the sound of her Mum and Mickey arrive behind her. She could hear how out of breath they were, and she couldn't help but smile. They didn't have the experience she had, in running. Life with the Doctor meant trainers were standard issue. Then she realised something, and turned to face her Mum.

"You knew." She said. "You knew he was coming. How did you know?"

Jackie smiled and took something out of her pocket, handing it to Rose. "It's a Mothers job to make things right."

Rose looked at what she held in her hand. It was her phone. She looked at her Mum, realising what she had done for her, understanding the choice she had made.

Jackie kissed her daughters cheek. Then she looked past Rose to the TARDIS. "You had better go. He's waiting for you."

Rose was almost too afraid to look, but she did. She turned around slowly, and looked into the grey blue eyes of the Doctor.

He smiled at her. His wide, wild, fantastic grin. He held out his hand and Rose took it. He drew her close and she breathed him in.  
The Doctor looked at Jackie for a second. "Does this mean we're friends?" He asked.

"No." Jackie said firmly. "It's worse than that, we're... family."

"Fantastic." The Doctor grinned, but not for long, as Jackie moved forward and jabbed him with one finger.

"You hurt her, and I'll hunt you down Doctor, I mean it."

"I'm not going to hurt her." The Doctor said softly. "Not ever again."

Jackie believed him. If she hadn't she would never have let him turn and walk back into the TARDIS, still holding on tight to Roses hand. The wooden door closed, and Jackie and Mickey were left standing alone on the pavement, staring at the TARDIS, waiting for the inevitable.

Mickey looked at Jackie as if he didn't know her. "She came home." He said. "...and you send her back to him."

Jackie shook her head. "She never came home Mickey - not really. I don't think she ever will. Not now."

Mickey looked at the TARDIS, then back to Jackie. "You know what they're doing in there, don't you?"

"No - and I don't want to!"

"He'll have his tentacles all over her, that's what!"

Jackie swung around and hit Mickey across the head. "I said I didn't want to know!" Then she looked back to the TARDIS as it began it's song, and dematerialised infront of them.

They stood in the loudest of silences for a moment, then Jackie turned to Mickey. "Does he really have tentacles?"

Inside the TARDIS the Doctor was at the control console, busy pulling levers and flicking switches, his eyes intently looking at various screens, until the time came when Rose saw a look of calm satisfaction come into his face. Another departure sucsessfully completed. He turned to look at her then, and Rose saw the glimpse of another emotion slip easily into his eyes, but it was not there long enough for her to give it a name.

The Doctor stood straight and tall for a second by the console, then he smiled. Not a grin, but a soft warm gentle smile that made Roses heart stop beating for a second. "Welcome home Rose."

She took a series of slow cautious steps toward him. Her wide eyes never leaving his. "You said I'd never see you again."

"Yes." He agreed softly.

"Never."

"Yes."

"Not even for..."

"Yes."

Rose smiled up into his face. Loving him entirely. "So how come you came back?"

"I've learn't a lot of things in my 900 years." The Doctor answered slowly. "But do you know what's top of the list?"

Rose shook her head, lost in him. "No."

"Some things, are better with two."

She felt a stray tear fall, and sit heavy under her lashes as she gazed at him, and she saw a look of concern come swiftly into the Doctors eyes.

"Don't... don't do that." It was almost a plea.

She frowned a little, not understanding. "What?"

His hand moved to cup her face, his thumb gently stroking away the teardrop, then coming to rest at the rose flushed apple of her cheek. "Don't cry. Not ever."

Rose leant her face into the gentleness of his hand, her eyes fluttering closed for a second, as she memorised his touch, so that she might keep it with her always.

But it was too much. She was too fragile. She had lost him once and barely survived. If he was to break this touch now... she did not think she would survive the loss of him a second time. So to save her own life she closed the small distance that remained between them, her arms winding up and around the Doctors neck, as she buried her face in his shoulder, her body trembeling. The Doctors hands moved swiftly to hold her tightly to him, his fingers brushing under the edge of her t-shirt so that his cool hands came into contact with her skin. For a fraction of a second he hesitated, but then he let his hands pull her closer against him, and when Rose lifted her head and looked into his eyes, he moved to capture her lips in a sure and certain kiss, that could have broken a heart of stone.

Rose could feel the cool touch of the Doctor, as his hands gently carressed her skin. She pressed herself so close to him, feeling only sensation and need sweep through her body. Her mind shut down, and she became a creature of wanton desire, as she clung desparetly to her Doctor, and responded like for like to his own subtle movements and touches. Her lips parted under the gentle coaxing of the Doctors kiss, and her heart soared as his tounge moved to open her mouth and deepen the kiss into a darker realm of sensation. She could feel his hand sliding to the small of her back, just at the top of her jeans. For a second she wondered how such a simple touch could so easily ignite the burning desire within her, but then, as she felt his hands sweep up her body, across her ribcage, one hand cupping her breast, still confined in her bra, she no longer understood thought, and fell completely, willingly, entirely into the arms of passion.

She was unprepared for the sudden loss of him, as the Doctor pushed her from him, his face haunted and his eyes dark with hunger. He held her at arms length, just looking at her. They studied eachother in this charged silence. Rose felt her heart beat hard and fast in her chest, the blood run hot in her veins, and she understood that it was all because of the way he was looking at her. She'd never had anyone look at her in that way before, not ever. Especilly not the Doctor. It was dark and possessive. She could not look away from him, even if she had wanted to, and she didn't want to.

"Rose." He touched her face, and she stirred slightly from the spell of enchantment he held her in. "If I do this... if we do this... there's no going back. It will change everything." His thumb softly crossed her open lips, in a possesive stroke. "You'll be mine." His voice was rough with a desire he was fighting to control, even now, as he warned her what she was risking.

But Rose understood the dangers, the desires, the fire, and she wanted all of it. She wanted him. Her hand touched his face, and she felt his jaw clench tight. But she smiled, and drew his lips down to hers. "Yes." She wispered softly. "Yours. Always." Then felt his mouth take hers in a feirce and barely controled kiss, that she responded to with a passion she had not know existed within her, till the Doctors touch.

In the next second Rose was swept up into the Doctors arms, as he carried her through the corridors of the TARDIS, until they reached his room, where he stopped at the door, looking into her eyes. This was to be her last chance, the last time he knew that he would even be able to offer her a choice, so he spoke the words softly against her cheek.

"Rose... stop me now if you don't want me to do this, because once I do... it will be too late. If you think that I'll be able to stop... I wont. " His eyes turned to almost black as he looked at her. "... ever." Rose stared at his mouth, then lifted her eyes to his, watching the battle that raged there. She loved that he was so protective of her. That even lost in his desire as he was , he still fought to offer her a way out, if she wanted it. She didn't. She loved and wanted him. Craved him. She touched his cheek in a caress that drew a soft sigh from his lips, making her smile as she grew aware of her power over him.

"Make love to me." She wispered softly. "Please."

He lay her gently down onto his bed, and moved his body against hers, kissing her lips and swallowing her moans and soft crys of pleasure. His hands worked their way under her clothes and undressed her in ardent silence. His eyes studied her naked body as she lay beside him, vunerable and passionate, and longing for the return of his touch. He trailed feather light kisses from her mouth, down her throat, across her naked breast, and then at her side, he stilled. His attention fixed on the healed scar she bore from her last journey with him. The memory of that time washed through him and he steadied his breathing. He brushed a thumb across the scar, hearing Rose gasp, seeing her body rise up to meet the touch. He lowered his mouth to her flesh, and flicked his tounge across it, he heard Roses breath catch in her throat. His lips kissed her skin with soft slow attention, learning her, memorising each sound or movement she made in response to every kiss, touch, and taste of her. He closed his eyes and lost himself for a moment in the music of her.

Rose began to push at his clothes, desparate to know his skin, his body. "Doctor." She wispered his name into his returning kiss, as his hands swept up her torso, resting to cup a breast, long cool fingers moving across a rose pink nipple. He heard her drag a ragged breath into her lungs, and he closed his eyes again to savour the sound. His tounge darting at the flesh of her breast, he closed his lips around its aroused peak and oh so gently teased it between his teeth. He heard her gasp, and he slipped further into the darkness of wanting her.

"Doctor!" Again she cried out his name. "Please..." The need to touch him was destroying her.

Understanding, he moved from her, standing at the side of the bed to rid himself of his clothes, his eyes never leaving hers, as she devoured his flesh with her own watchfulness.

He took his place beside her again, his body slipping against hers, the sensation of skin against skin provoking an unstable and rising passion in both of them. Roses hands traced the Doctors body, as his mouth claimed hers once again, his kiss almost savage in it's intensity. But she met his passion with her own. If the Doctor had thought before that he would never be able to give her up, once he had tasted her sweetness, then now, with her body wrapped around his, the scent of her intoxicating him... he knew it as an absolute. He would never, never, give her up now.

His hand slipped delicately down the length of her arching body, one finger deftly slipping inside her, to move slowly in and out in a rhythm as old as time itself. He looked deep into Roses eyes, as she lifted her body to meet his hand, silently begging him to continue, to increase her desire. He moved a little, planting small kissed over her firming tender breasts, until he claimed one as his prize, and fed from it like a hungry child, at the same time slipping another finger into Rose, and continuing his exploration of her most secret skin.

Roses eyes flew wide open, her body alive in a way it had never been before. Nothing had prepared her for this, for his lovemaking, nothing ever could have, she understood that now. Gasps of breath were torn from her as the Doctor continued his stimulation of her with his mouth and fingers. She cried out his name, and sensing that she was ready for him, the Doctor moved as instinct took over Rose, and she opened her legs, letting him move closer still. Their bodies so close now, Rose didn't need words to understand how much the Doctor wanted her, it was becoming increasingly obvious. She kissed him, her hands smoothing over his shoulders, her fingernails digging into his flesh as she felt him move to a place of belonging within her. He entered her, not with a single, sudden, worthless movement, but with infinate patience - each moment pushing deeper, further, until her body had taken him entirely, until he was held firm and tight, encased within her. Her eyes widend as the slow deliberate sensation of his movements sent tremors through her skin.

He looked deep into her eyes, and Rose knew that he was prolonging this for her, so that she would enjoy every breath and pulse of their lovemaking. Slowly, as he still gazed into her, and they held eachother tight, he began to move, withdrawing slightly, then returning to the tight welcoming hold , the slow pattern of thrusts, deeper into her each time, sent Rose spinning. She closed her eyes and let the Doctors slow precise movements wash over her. She thought that he was following the sound of her heart, as with every beat, he moved again, and as her heart began to race, his speed increased. He felt her muscles contracting, tightening and pulsing around him, through him. Such small insignifigant movements, and yet they were driving him further into the dark than he had ever known. Never before had he understood the power of flesh and blood more than this moment with Rose, her body and his body moving together.

Almost at the same moment as she soared up into him crying out his name, he in turn crashed against her hot skin, lost in his release. Rose clung to him as his body shook through her, hearing the breath of agony and pleasure that tore from him, and knowing that in this one act he had claimed her, marked her as his. It was basic and passionate, and she regretted nothing. She was his now. Just as much as he was hers.

They lay together, tangled and breathless, and for the first time in either of their lives... complete. The Doctor moved, looking into her eyes.

"I love you Rose." He said softly, then kissed her lips slowly and deeply before resting his head at her shoulder. Rose, already drifting away into an exhausted sleep, smiled to herself. She knew now that if empires could fall, and worlds could end, and stars could die, then anything was possible, perhaps even... a Time Lord could find a Human heart and love it forever.

THE END 


End file.
